Becky's Bits

Stretched too thin...

2006-03-18T22:26:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Cocoa Pebbles for breakfast, Corn Chex and Honey Nut Cheerios for dinner.

Kids. Work. Reunions. Church. Family. Housework. Jewelry. A teensy time for me.

It's just too much, and something's gotta give.

Thanks to all you great people who've linked to me. You can go ahead and un-link me, because I shan't be updating my blog anymore. I've shared with you glimpses of my life for a year. Thanks for being there with me. I'll still be visiting your blogs, so I'll see you around-- I just... I just gotta go now.

Lovies,
Beck

For Bear

2006-02-27T16:22:00.000-07:00

"Fading light dims the sight,
And a star gems the sky, gleaming bright.
From afar drawing nigh -- Falls the night.

"Day is done, gone the sun,
From the lake, from the hills, from the sky.
All is well, safely rest, God is nigh.

"Then good night, peaceful night,
Till the light of the dawn shineth bright,
God is near, do not fear -- Friend, good night."

My week in review

2006-02-23T21:37:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Cran-Vanilla Crunch and Crunch Berries

Monday: Spent President's Day with most of the siblings at my mommy's house. Got a debilitating migraine. Topped the day off by falling on the ice on my driveway when we got home. WITH The Boy in my arms. Spent the night worrying that he had a concussion, but realized in the morning after seeing the bruises and feeling the hurt that I took the brunt of the fall.

Tuesday: Still felt crappy. Didn't do any of the things I needed to get done before I start working again next Tuesday. Stayed up way too late.

Wednesday: Worked all day. Didn't get lunch, which made my migraine return. Came home to a baby that misses me way too much when I'm gone and wouldn't let me put her down the rest of the night. When the kids were finally wrestled into bed, I ignored the housekeeping and phone (sorry Mom, Sara, Sister Bartlett, and Strategic Marketing) and spent some much needed time bonding with The Hubby.

Thursday: Got up early and showered, thinking I would Get Things Done. Didn't happen. By the time both kids were bathed and dressed, it was lunchtime and naptime.
My plans for going back to work were originally going to be Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday, which is what I told the new childcare provider. My boss decided I was needed more on Mondays, though, so I called the childcare today to let them know I'd be needing them Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday instead. They informed me that they can't take the kids on Mondays-- they'd be over their adult to child ratio that they are licensed for. So now I'm trying to figure out how screwed I am.

Tomorrow I am taking the kids to the new childcare provider for a few hours to help them make the adjustment and get to know everybody. My provider prides herself in the fact that none of her kids ever cry on their first day. Somehow I think my kid is going to be the one to ruin that for her. He's a sweetie-- but damn.

Some good news, though-- the reunion I had started last Wednesday is in the works. I found the woman I was looking for, and talked to her Saturday. It is looking hopeful that she will say yes to meeting her half-sister. My client thinks I am the Most Amazing Person Ever, and it makes me feel all gooey inside.

I've been tagged by Sara, so I will get to that A-sap.

Crap.

2006-02-17T14:49:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Corn Chex

Our sewer is backed up again, and I had to call the swell guys at Remarkable Rooter. This happens at least once a year, frequently twice. I swear I moved straight into the Money Pit-- Except that I'm not sleeping with Tom Hanks. What is with my retarded house? First the furnace, now this. Nothing like the smell of raw sewage that has come up in your shower! Hot diggedy!

Happy Bloggaversary to me!

2006-02-16T09:57:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Honeycomb

A year ago today I started my blog! Betcha didn't think I'd last this long. Neither did I!

Had the evening from hell yesterday. It took me two hours to get home from work because of the big snowstorm and all the idiot drivers. When I got home Robin was screaming because she has apparently decided bottles are of the devil and won't have anything to do with them. The Boy hadn't taken a nap so he was making THAT SOUND-- the whining one that makes my ears bleed-- and Kitt was obviously frazzled and ready to drop-kick the nearest child. We were supposed to go to dinner at mom's last night, but after two hours in the car and the mess I came home to, we ditched that idea. She lives a half-hour away on a good day. Sorry, mom. You know how I like soup!

On an up note, I got my first search & reunion client since October. I am excited! I hope all will go well with this one. I am searching FOR the adoptee this time... the birthmother's daughter has initiated the search. Kind of a sad story-- the birthmother died 2 or 3 years after the adoption happened. She was only 25. My client is hoping to find her half-sister, but also trying to understand the mother she never got to know. I hope I can help on both counts.

For fun

2006-02-09T14:27:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Rice Krispies

Advanced Global Personality Test Results

Extraversion		36%
Stability		56%
Orderliness		30%
Accommodation		50%
Interdependence		30%
Intellectual		36%
Mystical		23%
Artistic		63%
Religious		90%
Hedonism		10%
Materialism		63%
Narcissism		43%
Adventurousness		16%
Work ethic		30%
Self absorbed		30%
Conflict seeking		10%
Need to dominate		16%

Romantic		43%
Avoidant		70%
Anti-authority		30%
Wealth		23%
Dependency		63%
Change averse		63%
Cautiousness		63%
Individuality		30%
Sexuality		23%
Peter pan complex		23%
Physical security		30%
Physical Fitness		50%
Histrionic		30%
Paranoia		36%
Vanity		76%
Hypersensitivity		30%
Female cliche		76%

Take Free Advanced Global Personality Test
personality tests by similarminds.com

Nicked from Carly

2006-02-08T09:21:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Honeycomb. Did they change Honeycomb? It seems more "whole wheat-y" lately. Not gross, but different.

If you've got a blog, go here. It will create a "word cloud" that takes commonly used words from your blog. I thought it was funny that "poo" is one of my words. I tried to post it for you to see, but I couldn't get it to work. So here is a link to it, courtesy of Lostnowfound (Thanks!)

Speaking of poo, The Boy poo-ed in the bathtub again yesterday. I was letting him play in the tub while I dressed Robin, and I heard him yell, "Mama, clean up!" I thought he was just ready to get out, so I kept telling him just a minute while I finished with Robin. Little did I know of the horror that was waiting for me. And I didn't have the Poo Spoon!

I'm not sure how I feel about The Boy assuming that I am the one who is supposed to come and clean it up.

I'm back. Okay already!

2006-02-03T14:09:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Western Family Brand "Crisp Rice". Whatever.

News!
I balanced my checkbook the other day, for the first time in like, 3 months. Seriously. I prefer the "what I don't know won't hurt me" approach to my finances. But I finally gave in and did the math. And boy, are we in trouble. No, make that Trouble (note the capital T!). So after a sleepless night, I went in to the office on Wednesday to talk to my boss. It turns out that the girl who took over my full-time position when I quit is now quitting herself, to go to school. I asked my boss if I needed to turn in a formal resume and application if I wanted the Adoption Assistant position again. She literally, physically, brightened and said, "how about part-time?"

Seriously, this is too perfect an opportunity to just be coincidence. Laugh if you must, but a prayer has just been answered. I had resigned myself to taking a full-time position, but Beth up and OFFERED part time. And they are TOTALLY willing to let me set the schedule I want.

So, starting in March sometime, I will be working three days a week instead of just one. After a year and a half of being a (mostly) stay-at-home mom, going back to work is a little daunting. The worst part will be leaving Robin. Aiden is ready, in NEED of the social interaction that daycare will provide-- but Robin? She's and I are so very bonded. I think it will probably be harder on me than her, but the move to bottle-feeding half the week will probably be a kick in the teeth--er, make that tooth-- for her.

The daycare thing has been freaking me out; until yesterday when I went and visited a place I am considering. It was really cool! I think Aiden will really like it. I've almost pretty much decided that is where I want my kids to be. Everything feels so right. And the prospect of not having to worry about whether my grocery check will bounce, or what we will pawn if our car breaks down, or actually having money in a savings account and possibly going on vacation! Ah, relief.

AND, I'm going to see if I can fenagle (is that how you spell that?) a half-day off at least once a month, so while the kids are all taken care of at daycare, I can go with my mom to the Family History Library. That would be so hott.

Stay tuned for my next blog post where I have pictures of what the Kirby Salesman vacuumed off our floor. Exciting, I know!

It's done. No going back now!

2006-01-25T19:57:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Cheerios

We tried to have it done on Monday, but when we got to the place in the mall where we took her, they said we had to have her immunization records with us. Huh? Like I carry those around on my person. Maybe I should, though! So we went home earring-less, with plans to go back today.

Little Cutie was such a trooper! She shrieked initially, but then really only cried for about five minutes. I think she looks darling! (Although I'm trying not to obsess about how the earring in her right ear is off-center.) I expected her to be grumpy all night after having it done, but they don't seem to bother her. We'll see what happens when I try to clean them!

I can't wait to make her earrings to wear when she is old enough. Perhaps I will make her a little silver bracelt she can wear now, to go with her new little studs. Ah, playing dress-up with my Pet Baby sure is fun.

Randomness

2006-01-22T23:18:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Wheat Chex. With banana slices!

Here are a few quick updates for you:

1) I'm going to kill this dog. She's gotten over her fear of the cats, and now delights in chasing and barking at them whenever one of them makes an appearance from underneath the bed. They will never forgive me, I'm sure. We cheer Willis on when he takes a swipe at her in retaliation. Only 4 more days of this...

On the up-side, this funny little dog likes to sleep under the covers, at my feet. My feet are normally blocks of frozen flesh that I try to warm up on my huband's poor legs. The dog, however, is keeping them nice and toasty.

2) I just played Star Wars Battlefront II with my husband. Have any of you geeks (said lovingly--I'm included!) played this? We just spent over a half-hour on one of the space boards, and now I am having a hard time controlling my mouse under normal circumstances. If I want to point the curser up, I keep pulling down. (If you've played this, I think you'll know what I'm talking about.) It's very frustrating. When I close my eyes I see space and little red and blue circles.

3) My lesson today in church totally sucked.

4) Tomorrow my mom is going with me to have Robin's ears pierced. I am a little nervous about this, mostly because of the pain involved for her, but also because I will be marring her pristine little body with holes. Holes to be filled with cute little earrings, though... and thereby ending ever answering the question, "oh, how old is he?"

A good friend of mine objected very strongly when I told her that I would pierce my baby's ears-- she thought it was taking away her free agency to choose if she wanted it done or not later. I keep thinking about this. But at the same time, what little girl in their right mind would not want their ears pierced? My dad wasn't going to let me have mine pierced. Ever, I think. It took most of the neighborhood women hounding him, and he finally gave in when I turned 10. I was so thrilled. Now I delight in wearing huge earrings.

She will look so cute, though. I will definitely post pictures. In the meantime, let me know your thoughts on baby piercings.

5) I have three new links. John's blog under "Blog Friends", and Lucinda's and The Candy Kid's under "People that don't know me from Adam". Check 'em out.

6) A writer contacted me through my blog this weekend after she found my story of Robin's Birth. She is writing a story about labor & delivery nurses, and wants my input on my experience with them. If the magazine accepts her article, I might be interviewed in depth for it! I am excited at the prospect.

7) I have eaten enough candy in the last two months to kill a large elephant. I can't get enough. I am willing to admit I have a problem. On to the next step...

8) It's almost midnight. I'm about to turn into a pumpkin, so it's off to bed for me. Me and the dog, that is.

New member of my brood

2006-01-19T11:28:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Oatmeal Raisin Crisp

We're babysitting for my sister-in-law this week while she goes off to warm, sunny Hawaii--where she'll get to wear shorts and sandals and probably get a sunburn, and she'll feel the warm wind in her hair and her pale, winter skin will see the light of day, and she'll get to go to the beach and lay on the warm sand, and see hot young people in hot young swimwear, and eat pineapple and see the sun... Oh wait, where was I again? Oh yeah, we're babysitting for a week. Here is a picture of my young ward:

I hope all goes well with the cats!

Oopsie!

2006-01-18T21:00:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Freakin' Pop Tart. No, not even a real PopTart-- A fake, generic-brand Toaster Pastery.

So, The Boy dropped the F-Bomb today. Kitt thought it was going to be me who taught him that (who, me?), but I am proud to say that it was not.

Still, it was a wake-up call to watch my language!

CREEPY!

2006-01-12T16:35:00.000-07:00

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahh!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!

Oh, by the way-- Today's Cereal: Pops

Bleah!

2006-01-11T10:10:00.000-07:00

Today’s cereal: Brown Sugar PopTart. Would’ve had Pops, though, if I could have.

I’m in the office today. It is always a huge, huge task to get out the door on the day I go into the office. It’s very difficult trying to put on make-up and fix your hair with a two-year-old wailing at your ankles and a baby that won’t let you put her down. And actually getting into the car is a feat in itself. I’ve got to get my purse, my briefcase, my breastpump, the little cooler to store the milk, my lunch, the diaper bag, the carseat with the baby, and The Boy all in the car. By 8:30. It usually happens at 9:00. Wednesdays mornings are a nightmare.

This morning topped the Worst Wednesdays list because in my rush to get out the door, I FORGOT TO BRUSH MY TEETH. I had to stop at the Albertson’s by my work and buy a toothbrush. And then I had to use the icky, stinky bathroom in my office. It creeped me out, because I could FEEL other people’s poo germs being brushed into my teeth. I feel a little ill.

It's always about you, isn't it?

2006-01-05T23:23:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: Berry Burst Cheerios. Picked the berries out and gave them to Aiden because he wanted them so. Ah, motherhood.

The Boy had the stomach flu last week, if you haven't figured it out. Vomit and diarrhea for 6 days. I never want to touch another person's poo again. It was exhausting, and I need some "Becky Time". Just for me. I haven't been truly alone for a long time. Quick trips to Wal-Mart do not count.

I have the winter blues. I need warm weather. I need sunshine. I need to wear sandals and capri pants and a scandalously lowcut top (by Mormon standards, anyways). I miss St. Croix. I have even considered going to a tanning bed for the first time ever, even though I have an Irrational Fear of developing skin cancer. It's that bad this year.

My Christmas tree is still up, and it's a huge fire hazzard. I'm not motivated enough to take care of it without Kitt's help. Plus, I'd have a two year old helping me. And by helping I mean breaking a lot of glass.

I miss my bestest friend, Shawna. I wish she were here right now so we could get pedicures. She always makes me feel better.

I know all the names of Thomas the Tank Engine's friends. I even have favorites, which is a little bit sad. Watching Southpark at 10:30 every night is the only "grown-up TV" I am able to get lately. Though I'd really like to try out The Office, that everyone is talking about. I also used to like Arrested Development a lot, but I haven't been able to keep up with that. Haven't seen Smallville lately; I haven't even seen Seinfeld reruns. Nope, it's all Thomas, all the time. If not Thomas, then it's Monsters Inc. or Baby Einstein. My brain is fried.

Okay, I just read all that. I really sound whiny, so I'd better shut up. Here's something uplifting to leave you with--My baby is so freaking cute, and I can't stop kissing her.

Lesser of two evils

2005-12-27T10:55:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: None-- PopTart on the fly. Too busy cleaning up bodily fluids.

Is it better to catch the barf in your hands, or clean it up off of the carpet?

Post-Christmas report

2005-12-26T11:07:00.000-07:00

Today's cereal: I've been too damn busy cleaning up Christmas crap and playing with my blog to eat any cereal. I did have a couple of caramels, though, so my most important meal of the day was covered.

So, my brother and sister-in-law got a new digital camera and they gave their old one to me. This is probably my favorite Christmas present, even though it wasn't really a present. Bryan doesn't realize it, but he could have tied a bow on it and saved himself some money buying the other present he gave me. (But the other present he got in Disneyland, so I'm awful glad he gave it to me. I am hoping that some "disney germs" get on me- thus enabling me to fly when I think happy thoughts. Ah, Disneyland, how I miss you.) I went a little nuts with my new camera, hence the photo-heavy post today.

We got The Boy some Thomas the Tank Engine trains, and had them all set up on a track for when he came out to see what Santa brought him (even though he was a-scared poopless of Santa). Here is his first look at his train set.

We spent a small bundle on presents for Aiden, but we could have gotten by with just the $14 Walmart train set. All he wanted to do was play with that, and he wouldn't open any other presents until we half-opened them for him so he could see what was inside. Once he caught a glimpse he would open the next one, but after he got it opened all he wanted was to play with that toy. It was the longest Christmas morning on record.

I think The Hubby had as much fun with the trains as The Boy did. What is it about trains that makes males go ape-poo-poo?

Robin was just adorable, although it was really pointless getting her anything. Or at least, it was pointless to wrap anything, since I ended up opening everything for her. She seems to like her new toys--almost as much as Aiden likes her new toys. He freaks out and screams "Mine!" everytime he sees her playing with them. (When he isn't busy with Gordon or Percy, that is. Have you ever heard a two-year-old say, "Chugga, chugga, whoo! Whoo!" Dammit that is cute.)

Thank you everyone for all of my neat-o presents!
Love and hickies and stuff,
Beck

Happy Birthday, Boy!

2005-12-21T17:27:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Life

Last Friday was Aiden's birthday. Since he has a funny little obsession for lights, we took him downtown to see the Christmas Lights at Temple Square. And since he is similarly obsessed with trains, we rode the Trax to get there. Aside from the bum-chilling cold, a good time was had by all.

Afterwards we went home for cake & ice cream with the grandparents. My mom is so friggin' awesome. She made the coolest cake for the Boy that looked like a road with trucks on it.

Yep, you guessed it, The Boy loves trucks, too. Deisels, garbage trucks, dump trucks, probably monster trucks. When he was a baby I refused to dress him in clothes that had construction vehicles on them. Now what does he love best? I should have refused to dress him in anything with U2 on it; then maybe he would love Bono as much as me. (Speaking of Bono, we went to the U2 concert on Saturday. But that is fodder for another blog post.)

Happy Birthday, my Boy. You've taught me more in the last two years than even you have learned with that amazing tape recorder mind of yours. I've never felt so much love before. I've never practiced so much patience before. I've never touched so much poop before. And I never thought I could be as happy as I am when you yell out, "Mama!"

Real Women

2005-12-19T14:19:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Rice Chex

I woke up this morning with a big ol' zit on my chin. Because I'm terribly vain, it really upset me. I don't know why it was so traumatic, especially since Lil' Becky (my zit's name-- yes, it's big enough to name) matches the one I got right between my eyes yesterday, and the one on my forehead the day before, and-- well, the last week or so I've broken out like I work at McDonalds. What is up with that? I'm almost 30 for pete's sake.

So Lil' Becky really had me bummed out this morning, and I think it's because I've been pretty down on myself lately. I've been feeling crappy about all the loose skin and flabby muscles sagging around my "babymaker", and I really, really need a haircut because I look like Ashton Kutcher in That 70's Show. I'm serious. Here is a picture of me today:
(Did you notice how I painted out his adam's apple? I'm so cool.)

Anyways,I've been feeling frustrated because I don't look like, oh, say Angelina Jolie, who is hott hott hott! Why can't I be hott (with two t's)? But then I stumbled across a website this morning, and I want to shout it's address from the rooftops for all the women to hear. Check it out. (Alert! Alert! Skimpy swimsuits and provacative poses! Consider yourself warned.)

Photo retouching. Go fig. I knew it existed, but I assumed a retouched photo would look like those cheesy BatBoy pictures on the front of the Enquirer. (Or like my "Picture of Me", above.) Not so! You can't tell who's photo has been retouched! So now I know that when I see Hott!Beyonce on the cover of Cosmo, she doesn't REALLY look like that in real life. Chances are, she's a real woman.

Real women have back fat. Real women have saggy boobs and butts. Real women are thicker around the middle than magazine covers would have you believe! Real women have bags under their eyes and moles and cellulite and short eyelashes and thin, lifeless hair... Real women can accept the stretch marks as an inevitable part of being Mommy, or of just being curvy. Real women work hard to be recognized for something other than how hott they are.

I guess I can live with Lil' Becky. Consider it a mark of a real woman.

Put a hold on those funeral potatoes...

2005-12-15T14:53:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Skipped breakfast! How unlike me.
Current Mood: Bored

So, The Boy almost died this weekened. Not really, but Kitt & I were a-scared that he was going to. Especially Kitt-- he had to see most of it while I was home with The Wee One.

Let me start over.

Friday afternoon, just before his nap, I noticed Aiden coughing. That dry cough--you know the one-- that sounds like a seal barking. It got worse and worse through the rest of the day, and by evening he was running a fever. OF COURSE my kid only gets sick on weekends and holidays! We thought he'd be okay, so we didn't take him to the Urgent Care that night. But everytime he coughed, one of us would run in there to make sure he was okay. It was obvious his throat really, really hurt, because everytime he coughed he woke up and started crying. He was miserable. WE were miserable. Saturday morning he started coughing again, and this time I noticed he was a little blue around the lips. And I watched his little chest sink in SO FAR trying to take in air! He looked like a little fish out of water. Let me tell you, it was pretty scary and really heartbreaking to watch your child not being able to breathe. The worst part was, there was nothing I could do! He started throwing a tantrum because he couldn't breathe (such a two-year-old!), and that only made it worse. I freaked out, and Kitt ran him over to the Urgent Care.

Three hours later I still hadn't heard anything. I was starting to think that maybe he had been sent over to the hospital or something. In my mommy-panic, I called the Urgent Care office and asked if my husband and child were still there. The receptionist wouldn't tell me anything other than the doctors had been moving pretty slow that day. So then I was imagining Kitt sitting in a crowded waiting room with tons of other sick people, while Aiden gasped for breath. And I kept thinking about how it was way past his lunchtime and way past his naptime, and he hadn't eaten anyting all day, and how he was probably being horrible (assuming he was still alive) and Kitt was having to deal with this. I made up my mind, packed a little lunch for My Boy, grabbed The Girlie, and headed to the office to see for myself.

I was surprised to find only one other person in the waiting room. The receptionist called to the back, and pretty soon a doctor came to fetch me. He started talking to me about all the things they had done to Aiden that morning, and none of it made any sense to me because it was all medical crap, and I was still in panic mode. He took me to a room and there was Kitt, looking miserable, and The Boy, looking more miserable.

It turns out he had croup. You parents out there who've dealt with this are probably saying, "well duh!" But it was pretty bad. They had to give him oxygen, and then they gave him some pretty kick-A steroids to stop the inflammation in his throat and lungs. And THEN they had to watch him to see how he reacted. He did okay for a while, but he relapsed and his oxygen levels dropped even lower than they were before. It was at this point they were considering sending him to Primary Children's Hospital. So my worries weren't that far off! But they dosed him up again with more steroids, and he did better after that. By the time I got there, they were just watching him again. He ate his little lunch--I was so glad I brought it!--and a little while later he was pronounced okay. And we went home.

At 8:00 that night Kitt took him back because he was having trouble again. They went through the whole routine again, but he responded well and he was able to come home in just a little while.

Monday morning we took The Boy in to our regualr doctor to follow up, like they told us to at the Urgent Care office. The Dr. listened to his lungs and said it sounded like he was getting better; but The Boy was being terrible and ornery and whiny. Dr. P. said, "This isn't like Aiden! There's really something wrong with this kid." So he checked him out all over, trying to see if he had an ear infection that had been missed, or something. But he was fine! I mentioned that he had cut a molar recently, and asked if that could be affecting him. The Dr. just laughed, and said that if he's cut one, another one is on the way. He watched him throw another tantrum, and said, "Yep! That's a molar alright." So I feel really stupid because we hauled our kid into the dr. and dropped a $20 co-pay to find out he was teething! Duh! But I was glad to know that he was not in danger of having another croup episode, and everything else was okay. He's been pretty ornery since, but at least we know why now. (Duh! So stupid!)

Tomorrow is Aiden's birthday, and we are going to take the Trax (Aiden loves trains!) downtown to see the lights at Temple Square (Aiden is fascinated by Christmas lights!). Just the three of us. I hope he will feel special and happy and loved. My sweet little guy! I'm glad he didn't die.

100 things, Part 2

2005-12-05T15:30:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Special K
Current Mood: Alright!

Okay, shut up already. I'm doing it NOW, Alright? Sheesh.

51. Most days I feel like I have a love/hate relationship with my toddler. Why won't he listen to me? He won't even look at me when I call his name. It's maddening. And how can he be so incredibly cute at the same time? Like when he calls pomegranates "mama-granets". Talk about melt your heart. But then there is the whining...And then his laugh. And he is so smart. But the tantrums! Argh!

52. I worry a lot about what I would do if the house caught on fire.

53. I'd rather lie to you than hurt your feelings.

54. Similarly, I'll go to the ends of the earth to avoid confrontation. If I'm confronting you about something, you know you have MORE than pissed me off.

55. I've just been given the job of teaching the teenage girls at my church. I NEVER wanted that job because I think teenagers are stupid and I have no patience for stupid. I'm not minding it so much, though! I hope I haven't spoken too soon...

56. I love all things Gummi. (Except those gummi bugs with liquid centers...)

57. Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday.

58. I like to be rewarded for good things I have done. Candy is usually enough of a reward.

59. The character traits I admire LEAST are impatience and selfishness.

60. The character traits I admire MOST are kindness and hard-workingness. (I know, that's not a word. How about 'industriousness'? The opposite of lazy.)

61. I feel like I am a really bad judge of character. I am no longer surprised that my first impressions are wrong.

62. I'm learning to heavily rely on "gut-feelings". I am finding they are rarely wrong.

63. My favorite color is Electric Blue.

64. I have hypothyroidism. And I am militant about getting it checked out every year. Mostly because I don't want the weight gain that often comes with it.

65. If we have another girl baby (not anytime soon! Don't worry!) I'm going to name her Leah. Leah Kapri.

66. I've been spelunking (sp?) once. It was terrifying and exhilarating. Once is enough for my lifetime.

67. I never bite my nails. I take great pride in having pretty hands.

68. I can't go without lotion.

69. I have a hard time saying what I want. I wish more people could read my mind.

70. I hate being taken advantage of. It happens frequently, though, because I don't speak up.

71. I like black licorice.

72. I like to watch American Idol.

73. I love seeing movies in the theatre.

74. At different times in my life I have wanted to be a veterinarian, a horticulturist, a geologist, and a travel agent- among other things.

75. I have absolutely NO ambition. I was fairly happy being just a secretary.

Okay, looks like there will have to be a part three as the baby is demanding attention. Same bat-channel, eh?

I thought of two more addictions...

2005-12-02T13:31:00.000-07:00

Well, three more actually.

9. Girl Scout Cookies. Damn those girl scouts! And Dammit, why aren't they available year- round?
10. Del Taco
11. Root Beer. How random is that? I can't get enough root beer.

Hi, My name is Beck and I'm an addict.

2005-12-02T09:42:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Multi-grain Cheerios
Current Mood: Lazy

HO. LY. CRAP.

Carly clued me in to this article. I'm well on my way there. Seriously. I might even need an intervention soon, guys.

I liked Carly's list today, so I am copying her. Out of love.

Top 10 things I am addicted to:
1. The Internet
2. Cereal for breakfast
3. Candy
4. Beads
5. This blog
6. Genealogy
7. Harry Potter Fan-fiction. I know! I'm sorry. Especially this author.
8. Calling and bugging my husband at work all day.

I can't think of anymore right now, so I guess it's my top 8. Maybe my husband will tell me two more things I am addicted to (that I wasn't even aware of) next time I call and bug him.

Peace out, bee-yotches.

Quick one so you know I'm still alive

2005-12-01T12:48:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Cran-Vanilla Crunch
Current Mood: Angry, isolated, irritable, annoyed.

What kind of animal are you?

You Are A: Mouse!

Some people are scared of mice while others find them cute and cuddly. As a mouse, you forage for food and manage to sneak into everything, but prefer to stay out of sight. The phrase "quiet as a mouse" isn't for nothing, however surprise one and expect a squeak! Your small size and quiet nature are partly what makes you a mouse.

You were almost a: Duckling or a Chipmunk
You are least like a: Puppy or a Squirrel Take the Cute Animal Quiz

This is why I have't finished my 100 Things List...

2005-11-15T22:30:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Pops!
Current Mood: Tired & ugly

What I've been up to:

I was up until 2:30 last night trying to finish a bunch of jewelry to give to a reseller. Ugh. I cleaned up just in time for the baby to wake up and eat, so i didn't get to bed until 3:00 a.m. Needless to say, today has sucked. But hopefully the jewelry does not.

100 Things, Part 1

2005-11-09T13:40:00.000-07:00

Today’s Cereal: Cran-Vanilla Crunch
Current Mood: Industrious

Alright. This is it. 100 things about me (Part One). Because I know that you want to know all about me, I’m that awesome.

1. My first name is NOT Rebecca. It’s just Becky.

2. It doesn’t bother me when people call me Rebecca—I secretly feel smug about them being presumptious.

3. My first name came from my dad’s cousin, Becky, who was killed in a car accident when she was a teenager.

4. My middle name is Louise, and for a really long time I thought I was named after the Hispanic guy from Sesame Street. You know, Luis.

5. My middle name really came from a close friend of my parents. I’ve met her about 3 times that I can remember.

6. I believe in ghosts. I didn’t think I was a-scared of them, but recently I think I am.

7. I love my job as an Adoption Confidential Intermediary. One day I hope to be the area’s leading expert.

8. I hate bugs. All bugs. Especially spiders, cockroaches, and earwigs. And centipedes. Man, they’re nasty! Oh, and grasshoppers, especially big ones. Bees are icky too. The list goes on.

9. I have “personal space issues”. My personal space is about 2 feet wider than most people’s. Don’t get in it (unless I put you there by moving closer myself).

10. I knew when I was 16 that I was going to marry Kitt. I’m not sure if he did or not.

11. I started teaching Sunday School about 4 years ago, and discovered that I can be a good teacher. I was promised in a blessing when I accepted the position that I would “find a new talent”, and I certainly did. IMHO.

12. I like to sing, but I get stage fright so bad that doing so in public is rarely enjoyable.

13. Whether I sing in the shower or not is a good indicator of my mood/energy level.

14. I can’t remember what life was like before my kids. It must have been really boring. Or just really relaxing.

15. I’m late for everything. I was almost late for my own wedding.

16. I tend to be rather vain. I won’t go out of the house without make-up on. And I’d rather look good and be late than be on time and look frumpy.

17. I don’t like swimming because I don’t like to get cold and wet and ugly.

18. I used to be able to paint. I haven’t attempted it for probably 8 years.

19. I married when I was 19. I turned 20 four days later.

20. I have a hard time with “chit-chat”. Social situations with people I don’t know are difficult as a result.

21. If I have to “chit-chat” with someone, I pretend in my mind that I am either Kitt’s sister Dawn, or my friend Shawna. Both are very good at talking to strangers.

22. I haven’t been to the dentist for probably 3 years. Maybe more. Hate going.

23. I am allergic to cats, but I have three. They don’t seem to bother me.

24. I am the youngest in my family, and the only girl. My big brothers took very good care of me. I don’t recall being overly-teased.

25. I call my mom nearly every day because I still need her. It probably annoys her. But she always answers my stupid questions. (like, how long do you cook this-and-this? Or what do I do if my kid does such-and-such?)

26. I think my mom deserves to be sainted, and I bristle if you talk badly about her. Guaranteed way to get on my “Shit List”.

27. If I could start a non-profit organization, I would start a temporary animal shelter for women who are trying to leave abusive relationships but have nowhere for their pet to go. Did you know that often women won’t leave because they won’t leave their pet? It happens, and it’s sad. I’d shelter their animal until they could get a place that will take it. Or I’d promise to find it a good home if it came to that.

28. If I were the personification of one of the Seven Deadly Sins, I’d be Envy. Or maybe Pride.

29. I like smells. They mean a lot to me. Every time someone goes on vacation, I ask them what it SMELLED like when they come back.

30. I thought New York City smelled like coffee, urine, and tar.

31. I don’t mind the smell of skunk. It reminds me of staying at my dad’s boss’s ranch when we were young.

32. I was dangerously close to full-fledged anorexia the year after I graduated from high school. It was a very dark time for me.

33. I’ve never fired a gun, and don’t ever intend to. I won’t have a gun in my house. I held one once, and it gave me a very evil feeling.

34. Sometimes I think I like my dead relatives better than my living ones. I wonder if I would still feel that way if I could meet my ancestors.

35. My ancestors take up about 25% of my waking thoughts.

36. Sometimes I wish I didn’t have kids. That makes me feel like a bad mother.

37. At the same time, I’d like to have two more.

38. I have a lot of hobbies and interests. I have very little time for any of them. I have to tackle them one at a time now.

39. I’d sacrifice food for sleep. There’s nothing better than sleeping in until 10 a.m. I haven’t done that for two years now. I probably won’t get to again for another 15.

40. My proudest accomplishment has been giving birth naturally. Twice. I secretly think I should have been given a plaque or a trophy for this.

41. I cry every time I read The Rainbow Bridge. Aw crap, I’m crying now just thinking about it!

42. I secretly like to speak in church. I think I’m good at it.

43. I was mad that I didn’t get the lead in the high school musical. I was offered a chorus position instead, and turned it down. I didn’t want to devote that much time to a lousy chorus position.

44. I thrive on approval. I am constantly worried that I am doing something wrong.

45. I wish I knew how to speak Italian. I started to learn, but haven’t done anything further about it for several years.

46. I like being in my husband’s personal space. I think his aura comforts my own. If I believed in that.

47. I sleep with a blanket. My “Soft”. It is really my mom’s old nightgown.

48. I am upset that I still look like I am 4 months pregnant. Otherwise, I am pretty okay with how I look.

49. Except that I would sell a kidney for curly hair. I hate my straight, straight hair.

50. In my mind I look a lot more like a cartoon; like an anime character. Sometimes I am surprised that I don’t really look like that.

This is harder than I thought! Stay tuned for Part Two.

True Enough

2005-11-07T11:40:00.000-07:00

Arty Kid

Whether you were a drama freak or an emo poet, you definitely were expressive and unique.

You're probably a little less weird these days - but even more talented!

Who Were You In High School?

All Hallow's Eve

2005-11-04T13:00:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Cran-Vanilla Crunch & Frosted Rice Krispies
Current Mood: Meh.

Here we are at my brother and sister-in-law's Halloween Party! I look a little pissed-- it's because I had been wearing a mask (I'm CatWoman if you can't tell...must keep with the family theme!), but the mask was messing with my periphe.... periphrea.... perif.... Aw hell, I couldn't see out the sides. And it was giving me a kick-A headache. I had to ditch it.

The Boy wouldn't wear the Batman mask. Little Turkey. Oh well, he was still cute. Fun party, Bry & Jana! Sorry our family always takes most of the prizes. We're cool that way.

Trick-or-Treating did NOT go well. For some reason The Boy threw a tantrum at every doorstep. And of course the people inside heard him crying and answered the door-- so there we were with our freaking-out toddler, looking like total asses for dragging him around when he didn't want to go. Embarrassing. We went to a grand total of THREE houses. Enough for him, but it meant very little candy for me to steal from him. Poo.

Enough with the %#%!@(!&@@$ spam!

2005-10-31T16:08:00.000-07:00

Today's Cereal: Cheerios for breakfast, Life for lunch
Current Mood: A little lonely

Dear Sauerkraut H. Odom,

It is really kind of you to drop me an e-mail every so often (to see how I am doing, I'm sure). I really appreciate it, even though I think two or three times a day may be overdoing it. You are one awesome dude. I have no doubt that you are great in bed, so really--you can stop telling me. Honest, I KNOW by now. You've told me, what, a million times? Maybe you are just trying to be funny, but that's enough. Really. And while we are on the subject, could you please stop trying to sell me your penis-enhancing products? You're a good friend and all, but I just don't need any Vicagra. Or any Cinalis or Leviptra. Promise. In fact--and I know this might be hard for you to hear-- I don't even have a penis. No, it's true-- I looked.

I hope I'm not breaking your heart by telling you that. Because it seems like-- judging from the amount of e-mail you send me-- that you expect me to single-handedly finance your whole "penis business". I thought it would be better to just be honest with you, and let you know up front rather than lead you on. So maybe you should just stop the e-mails altogether. Oh, sure, I'd welcome the occasional "Hi, how's your kids/health/life" e-mail, but I just can't deal with anymore "business" e-mails. I'm sure you understand. I'm glad we had this little talk.

You rock! Keep up the good work in bed, and good luck finding someone else to hock your wares to.
Your friend forever,

Beck

Question for you

2005-10-28T00:31:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Kix
Current Mood: Uptight. My teeth hurt from clenching my jaw due to stress!

So, if a movie were to be made of your life, who would you cast as yourself? I'd cast Winona Ryder. She's small and dark, cute but not gorgeous, and a little strange.

I'd also cast Josh Lucas as Kitt. Love those blue eyes! (Before I knew Josh Lucas' name, I called him "The Fake Matthew McConaughey", because I always got them mixed up. Aren't I cute?)

Well, crap!

2005-10-25T21:42:00.000-06:00

You Failed 8th Grade Math

Oh no, you only got 6/10 correct!

Could You Pass 8th Grade Math?

It's been a while, okay? I always HATED math. I still have nightmares about high school math class. I dream frequently that I haven't done any of my homework for months and months, and the end of the term is coming up... I'll NEVER be able to catch up with all that work! Or I dream that I am sitting down to take a final, but I haven't BEEN in the class since school started because I was sluffing with my friend, Kerri. THE ANXIETY! I hate those dreams. As much as I hate math.

Uh-oh... time to make myself a "Swear Jar"

2005-10-25T11:11:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Peanut Butter Cookie Crisp
Current Mood: Amused

So, I was playing with The Boy just now, and the phone rang. I put him down (which started a tantrum), and I ran down the hall to get to the phone before the answering machine picked up. Running behind me, mad as hell, was The Boy-- who was yelling, "Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!"

To that I have to say, Dammit. The Boy has picked up a new word! Not only did he get it from me, he used it in context. Now that's comedy.

No, I CAN'T jump.

2005-10-20T17:43:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Vanilla Yogurt Burst Cheerios
Current Mood: Introspective

I am nursing my baby as we speak. (or whatever). This means that I am typing one-handed, and it is very slow-going.

I love breastfeeding. In my pre-baby days (you know, the days where we went to Disneyland every year, stayed up late, did what we wanted, ate out a lot, dropped everything to see a movie, and had really nothing to live for?) I used to think that I'd be really creeped out about breastfeeding. But now I am a big proponent. Ladies, if you have a baby and you are able to do it, I recommend it. There is nothing quite like the closeness, nothing like the feeling of being so needed. Baby Robin sure is sweet. She is currently stroking her hand back and forth across my chest, a lot like a kitten doing happy-paws. Sometimes when I hold her up on my shoulder, she wraps her arm around my neck and holds on tight, like a baby chimpanzee. So sweet!

I worked in the office yesterday. I do reunions from home; when I am in the office I scan the old adoption files into a digital format that will be searchable, as well as safer in a fire. It is a slow process, because I have to read all the casenotes from every file as I do it. The stories are so interesting! They are so heartbreaking! And I am completely hooked into them. There was one file I read yesterday that has really had me thinking:

1950. Young girl from a small farming community came to the big city to place her child for adoption. She thought she'd have a better chance of finding a good home for her baby in the big city, because no one in her town would take the baby. The reason why? The baby was part Black. Sadly there are still people out there today that will not take a child of a race other than their own, but I would hope that nobody today would take it to these extremes: The child was 1/32 black.

Are you kidding me?

No. I'm not. Get this: In doing our family history, my mom and I have discovered that my mom's dad's dad's mom's dad's mom's mom (or maybe dad) is black. Did you get that? In other words, one of my great-great-great-great-great grandparents is black. If I'm figuring right, that makes my grandpa, my mom's dad, 1/32 black. Back in 1950 no self-respecting white family would want him! Isn't that sad?

I believe that makes me 1/128 Black. Would I be similarly unwanted? How much was "too much" Black? In case you were wondering, I got nothing but the dark brown eyes. The baby in the adoption file I was reading didn't even get that much... he was blond-haired, blue-eyed.

Do you want to hear the end of the story? After a year the agency still could't find a family for him. But it worked out okay... the birthmother called back, said she was getting married, and that her husband wanted to adopt her baby. Since he hadn't been adopted already, the agency happily gave him back.

Interesting, interesting stories.

New Link

2005-10-12T12:25:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Golden Grahams
Current Mood: Sneaky (I'm posting at work! Shh!)

Quickie for you today--
Just want to introduce a new "Blog Friend", LostNowFound. AKA, Kelly.

Kelly went to school with me, and I will proudly admit that I had a small crush on him in high school. I think that stems back to when we were in Elementary together. For the 4th, 5th, and 6th graders, our elementary school had "dances" (pre-teens and pre-pre-teens swaying back and forth WITHOUT TOUCHING- because you still were afraid of cooties even then). The very first dance I went to as a 4th grader I was SO SCARED! And being a shy little mouse, I stood against the wall wanting to disappear because no one was asking me to dance! Kelly became my knight in shining armor that day because he so gallantly rescued me from being a wallflower. Not only did I get to dance, I danced with a 6th grader! So thanks, Kelly, for giving me such a nice memory and possibly saving my self-esteem from permanent damage.

Remember when we went bowling that one time? That was awesome.

Boo!

2005-10-11T15:38:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Honeycomb (its so big, yeah, yeah, yeah!)
Current Mood: Overwhelmed

So, sorry I've been neglecting my blog. Life goes on, and you don't need to know about it. Except that my mother was in the hospital with blood clots in her lungs and in both legs. Yeah, scary. But I knew in my heart and in my mind that she would be okay. She's home now, and slowly recuperating.

I went out yesterday and bought a Batman costume for The Boy. It will be the first Halloween that he will have a clue about what's going on, and Kitt and I are excited to take him trick-or-treating. Guess what we are dressing baby Robin as? Batman's sidekick, of course. Don't be stupid.

I love Halloween. I love the costumes, the scariness, and especially the candy (Kitt and I start buying candy a month in advance, because we know we are going to eat half of it before Halloween is even close.) I love ghost stories. I love the Halloween shows that my radio station does every year where listeners call in with their real-life ghost experiences. They also have the Utah Ghost Investigators Society on every year, and they play recordings they have made of ghosts. That one was on this morning. So SPOOKY! And I am home alone. More or less.

Speaking of scariness, I wanted to share My List of Irrational Fears. For therapeutic reasons, I guess. Here you go, in no particular order:

Spiders. Any and all. Even the one I am letting live in my kitchen window. I know this is really OCD of me, but everytime I take a shower I have to hold up my towel and inspect it front and back to make sure there are no spiders on it before I dry myself off. If I forget to do that, I panic mid-dry and have to turn on the water again to wash off any spiders that might have been on my towel and got on me. I know, I know-- that makes me sound effing crazy. Live with it.
Choking. I have this serious fear that I am going to choke on something. And more specifically, I am afraid I am going to choke on something while I am driving. Will I have the presence of mind to pull over? Or will I panic and crash my car and die in an accident before I can choke to death? And what if I am alone? Or worse, what if the kids are with me? What will it do to them to watch me choke to death? Naturally, however, this Irrational Fear does not stop me from stuffing my pie-hole with candy at ANY TIME, even when I am driving. Yes, I am still carrying around 20 extra pounds from being pregnant, thanks for asking.
The Dark. Yes folks, I am afraid of the dark. No, I don't sleep with a nightlight-- I sleep with my husband. He's just as good. I FREAK OUT if the power goes out and I am in the windowless bathroom. When I'm home alone at night, every light in the house is on. I think fears #1 and #5 feed into this fear.
Sharks. Why the eff am I afraid of sharks when I live in landlocked Utah? The nearest ocean is like, 1,000 miles away. And yet I am. I don't like going in the water at California beaches anymore because the water is too dark/dirty to see what is down there. My leg could be bitten off and I wouldn't have seen it coming (Although seeing it coming probably won't make it any better....) The ocean in the Carribean is much better because it is crystal clear, and you don't have to wet yourself every time some kelp grabs your leg like you would in the Pacific Ocean, because you can see that it is just kelp and not Jaws. But still, I had a panic attack the first time I went snorkeling (in St. Thomas, even!) because I realized how very afraid of sharks I am. This does not stop me from watching Shark Week on the Discovery Channel any time I can, though... it's like watching a car wreck, you know?
Eating a bug. Do NOT ask me to "open my mouth and shut my eyes", I don't care how big of a surprise you have. Will. Not. Do. It. EVER. I MUST see what is going into my mouth. This is part of the reason I don't like ground meat. I don't know WHAT might be ground in with it. I agree with Jerry Seinfeld when he said that the worst part about being blind is not knowing whether there is a bug in your food. I won't eat with my eyes closed, I won't eat in the dark. I even prefer my fruit cut up rather than whole, because you never know when you are going to bite into a peach and find a worm in the middle (a la "Labryinth), or worse, HALF A WORM. I must SEE what I am eating, and I have to look at each bite of my food before I eat it. This is going to pay off for me, because one day I will see a bug in my food, and my persistence will save me from eating it. All you schmoes who shovel food in your mouth without a second look can choke on your insects. I will be laughing at you. And then I will panic because you are choking.

Happy birthday to me!

2005-09-29T16:38:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Skipped breakfast! Now how did THAT happen??
Current Mood: Content
The Boy's New Word of the Day: Sorry

So, my sweet brother Bryan took me to McDonald's for lunch today so the kids could play. It was awesome-- a nice little break. McDonald's really does have good fries. If only they had fry sauce! Looking forward to the crepes we are having for my birthday dinner. Birthdays are awesome!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I did another reunion yesterday between an adoptee and her birthmother. My smoothest case ever! Except that I felt so bad charging my client the $400 fee when it only took me 20 minutes to find her birthmother. I even asked my boss if we could waive half the fee, and I wouldn't even bill the agency for my time. She said no, the crusty old biddy. We had a big argument when we first started my search & reunion program about the fee... I said $400 was way too much, she thought it wasn't enough and that was as low as she would go. I don't usually speak up; I'm not one to argue; but this was something I felt strongly about, so I surprised myself when I told her, "To me, $400 is food on my table and a roof over my head-- to you, it's a Gucci watch!" She was shocked that I said that (so was I!), and probably offended. But it's true... she lives in a ritzy neighboorhood, has never struggled for money. She doesn't know what it's like to go without something you REALLY want because you can't afford it. My heart breaks everytime I tell a hopeful adoptee that there is a $400 fee and they sigh and tell me they can't afford it. But alas, what can I do? Anyways, I am happy for my client, happy for her birthmother. They've both been thinking about the other for a long, long time. I'm glad I could hook them up.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Talked to my best friend today. It's been a while. I miss her. She is pregnant and sick and I can't help her becasue she's a jillion miles away. She always has good advice for me. I wish I could be a better friend to her.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This weekend is the Gem Faire! Can't wait to get myself a crapload of beads. I look forward to this thing all year. I wish I had a spare $400 to throw around for this! I have big plans for a watch I want to make for my mother-in-law. I really have a great mother-in-law. I have a great mother, too! It's her half-birthday today. Happy Half-Birthday, mom! Maybe I will make you a half a cake.

My birthday wish list

2005-09-26T16:42:00.000-06:00

Upon Holly's request and as previously promised, here is what I want for my birthday (this Thursday!), in no particular order:

These. Or something like them (i.e., slightly stretch, straight leg, mid-rise). Size 12. Petite or short if possible.
This. Coconut Lime or Vanilla Sugar.
Something like these. Black. Small or medium? I don't know-- how do you measure hands?
I want this from Kitt (size 5, blue topaz) because my wedding ring won't fit me till I lose some of the baby-weight. Stupid baby-weight. Go to hell.
One 'o these. In Victorian Blue, Raspberry Beret Red, or White. Medium.
I rather like this, in Cranberry Sauce Red. Medium.
This would be fun.

That's all the specifics I can think of. Movie tickets & dinner gift certificates are good, too. A date would be a great gift!

Ah, I love birthdays. Come to my party, -K-? We're having crepes for dinner, watching the Smallville season premiere (yes, I AM that big of a geek), and having lemon cake with cream cheese frosting. See you then!

Okay, this is it. The long-awaited "Spider in my Window" story.

2005-09-25T22:58:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Golden Grahams
Current Mood: Creeped out
The Boy's New Word of the Day: Play

I hate spiders.

I REALLY hate spiders.

I can’t remember when this started; it’s always just been. I remember when I was first traumatized by a spider. I was probably 10 or 11, maybe older, and I was reading in bed by the light of my flashlight. I felt something tickle my face and I thought it was a strand of my hair. It wasn’t. I don’t think I have to finish the story. Let’s just say, screaming was done, tears were shed, testimonies were strengthened. My testimony of hating spiders, that is.

Our first apartment when Kitt and I were married was a run-down pile of shit--I mean, bricks--that was too hot in the summer, too cold in the winter, and FULL of spiders. Big ones, that strangely all had only seven legs. Kitt would often come home to a bowl set upside-down on the floor, and he didn’t even have to ask. He knew it was his duty as the man of the house to 1) please me in bed, 2) call any repairman we might have to deal with, and 3) kill any spiders that I had trapped under a bowl but was too scared to get close enough to kill. The spiders were so bad that I frequently had nightmares of them. I would thrash around in bed, cry, scream, and in-general panic, until Kitt woke me up. I think it must have scared him at first to see me like this, but he soon learned to just turn on the light and I would wake up and calm down. It finally took my brother-in-law with a degree in psychology to help control the nightmares. He taught me to mentally turn anything that frightened me in my dreams into something I like. It was a valuable lesson-- to this day I still turn nightmares into kittens.

Hate ‘em, hate ‘em, HATE ‘EM! I friggin’ hate spiders!

Why, then, is there one living in my kitchen window?

It’s one of those creepy ones that spins its web into a tunnel which it hides in whenever you get too close. When I first discovered it, I tried to suck it up with my dustbuster. I thought it had worked, but all I had done was get rid of the web. By the afternoon, the web was back, and there sat the spider again. Smirking at me, I think. I tried this several times, but it always came back. I started to admire its tenacity, and so I let it stay. “One more day,” I thought, “and then I’ll have Kitt take care of it.”

One morning as I was washing off The Boy’s high chair tray, I flicked water at the spider in a hate-filled tantrum, angry that it was still there and still scaring me. That was when it happened. Droplets of water glistened on the web, and the spider slowly came out of its tunnel… and drank the water. I watched it drink some of the water.

Kitt has told me of how his wise mother shared with him the secret to getting someone to love you. The secret is to get them to do something for you. Service will eventually equal love. I saw this in action that morning.

I’m not saying that because I gave the spider something to drink that I love it now. Oh no. Oh no, no, no, no, no. But as I watched it drink that water, I was struck by how…how living it was. It was a living creature. And I thought to myself, “Its not bothering me. It hasn’t left the window sill yet. And it’s probably eating all the fruit flies that have been annoying me since I let that banana go too long.” This was quickly followed up with a, “But the minute it leaves the window, it is DEAD!”

A few days later I managed to catch one of the afore-mentioned fruit flies. I wondered if I could get it stuck in the spider’s web, and what would happen. I took the cup I had the fly in over to the window, and I lifted my hand off it. The fly immediately flew straight into the web, and before I could even BLINK the spider had shot out of its tunnel and caught that fly. It carried it back to the entrance of its little hidey-hole, and sat there with it. Looking at me, so I thought. Maybe thanking me? Probably wondering what the catch was. It ate that fly. I was disgusted. But fascinated.

I’ve since fed it again. Now I look for opportunities to catch little insects. I’m a little sickened with myself.

Kitt teases me about it. He’s asked me what I’ve named it. “No names!” I’ve insisted. “Once I name it, it will be a pet. I WON’T have a spider for a pet. I hate spiders.” I try hard not to think of it even having a gender. Because it’s gonna go. Eventually. If it gets any bigger, I won’t be able to stand looking at it. And, as Kitt reminded me, we might end up with an eggsack. That’s all I need, a zillion tiny spiders with tenacity and an inherited will to live. Nope, that Bad Boy is a GONER.

Soon.

I think.

Did you meet my uncle, Bruce Wayne?

2005-09-19T13:56:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Rice Chex and Pops
Current Mood: Snacky
The Boy's New Word of the Day: Bach

So, I was singing this funny little song to The Boy the other day:

"I love Mommy, she loves me.
We love Daddy, yesiree!
He loves us and so you see,
we are a happy family."

Every time I sang it, Aiden would say in his cute little voice, "A-gin!"

I started putting in other names instead of Mommy & Daddy, like Aiden and Robin. Pretty soon The Boy started requesting people for me to sing about, and so I complied. We sung the song about Papa, and Gramma, and Quinton. I could barely make it through his last request though, I was laughing so hard. But sing it, I did:

"I love Aiden, he loves me
We love Batman, yesiree...."

I hope he makes it to the next family reunion!

Yeah, I'm still alive.

2005-09-16T23:11:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Kix (What is the singular for Kix? A Kick?)
Current Mood: Lazy
The Boy's New Word of the Day: Again!

Seriously, how cool is this website?

I'm still planning on telling you about the spider in my window. Just so's you know. I am just posting this so you won't think I died or anything.

Check out my newest links: Carly and Dawn

New Necklace

2005-09-13T09:14:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Fruit & Yogurt Special K (finished the box!)
Current Mood: Annoyed with people.
The Boy's New Word of the Day: "Crisp". (He was trying to say Golden Crisp, which is what he ate for breakfast!)

Here's a new necklace I made this weekend. Tiny wooden beads paired with a large mother of pearl mosaic pendant. I'm rather fond of this one, and wish I could keep it for myself.

Making stuff makes me happy!

About time, eh?

2005-09-12T15:19:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Fruit & Yogurt Special K (It's new!)

Current Mood: Anxious for a nap, but knowing I won't get one.

The Boy's New Word of the Day: Aiden and I were looking at the pictures of him on the computer, and he was telling me what they were (i.e., "Papa!", "Ball!", "gramma!"). I asked him what this picture was of, and he said, "Mess!"

And so a New Word of the Day is born. Holy crap it was cute.

So, Holly tagged me about a decade ago to play a blog game wherein you list five things you dislike using your five senses for. (I never got tagged for the one where you list what you like using them for! *sniff*) Oh well. Here we go!

Smell: 1) The Boy's poopy diapers. 2) Burning something that spilled on the burner. 3) Week-old litterbox. 4) Mold. 5) Fish (see also Taste)

Sight: 1) The Boy's poopy diapers. Especially when he's been eating raisins. (Now you are all thinking of that! Hee hee!!) 2) Spiders (except one... I'll tell you about it later this week...). 3) Violent movies-- just can't do 'em. 4) Pregnant women smoking/drinking. 5) Really old people. Old people make me sad.

Taste: (this one will be hard to narrow down... Yes, I'm a picky eater.) 1) The Boy's poopy diapers. Just Kidding! Ha! Fooled you. #1 for reals) Hamburger, especially in any kind of casserole. 2) Fish. Any kind of seafood, really. 3) Many kinds of Pizza, but especially Little Ceasar's. Gag. 4) Under-done chicken. And by "under-done" I mean "not burned". 5) Mold. Once when I was pregnant with Aiden I got chocolate milk at a restaraunt. It had been made with moldy Nesquick, and I drank a huge gulp before I realized it. Ever since then I can taste if even ONE ATOM of something I'm eating has mold on it. Not cool.

Touch: 1) The Boy's Poopy diapers. Seriously. Feeling poo through a baby wipe, especially when it is still warm. 2) Raw meat. 3) Bugs. Any kind of bugs (but especially spiders). 4) Hair brushing gently across my face. Reminds me too much of bugs. 5) Bare feet outside, or on a dirty floor. I don't like my feet to get dirty.

Hearing: 1) The Boy's whine. Maddening! 2) The Wee One starting to cry at 3:00 a.m. 3) Rap. 4) The Bishop's clerk saying "The Bishop would like to meet with you this week..." 5) A cat hurking up a hairball.*

So there you go. Hmmm... who to tag.... I shall choose a new blog friend, Hottie. Hopefully she will check back at my blog and see that she has been tagged!

Coming soon: The Spider in my Window, A List of Irrational Fears, and My Birthday Wish List!

*Have you ever heard this sound? A little scary if you've never heard it before. We have a funny story about this... Well, not so much funny as it is long: We'd taken our fattest, dumbest, clumsiest, (But softest & snuggliest) cat to the after-hours emergency vet once. While we were in the waiting room, a cute young couple came in with their cat, just frantic. They told the receptionist that their cat had started to make this horrible gagging sound, and they were really worried about it. Kitt and I just looked at each other and said, "Hairball!" This cute, albiet dumb and new-to-the-world-of-cats couple had just earned themselves a $75 vet bill over a HAIRBALL! Ha!

Robin's Blessing

2005-09-05T00:33:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Didn't have any! I'll have to make up for that tomorrow...
Current Mood: Googley-in-love with my baby
The Boy's Word of the Day: Green

So Robin was blessed in church today. Er, yesterday (after midnight already?!). For the non-Mormon, a blessing is akin to christening. Here she is looking adorable-- all smiles, and so pretty in the beautiful dress my mom made.

I stressed about food and cleaning the house and the yard looking good and the weather and who to invite and whether we could pull it all off and still make it to the church on time; but everything went flawlessly. No, that's not true-- my mom got stung by a hornet. But everything else went well. I'll be eating leftover muffins the rest of the week! Mom took this picture, and I laughed out loud when I saw it. Kitt and I look BEAT. Worn-out. Exhausted. Bushed. Dog-tired. I didn't realize it until I saw it from someone else's point of view. I can't believe I've been walking around looking like this!

It was a big day for our little baby! I am very glad it's over with; but I'm just as glad we had to have it. I'm glad she's in our family. She's a little sweetheart, and I couldn't wait for her to come.

And stuff

2005-09-02T00:35:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Special K
Current Mood: Odd
The Boy's Word(s) of the Day: Library--that's a big word for a little guy! He also said Meow for the first time which was ridiculously cute.

Okay, so I've obviously got a new feature to my blog. The Boy has started talking with a vengeance after doing nothing but pointing and whining for so long. He amazes me every day with a new word that he has learned, and a lot of times I am baffled by where he picks them up. The day his Word of the Day is "shit", though, won't confuse me. That one will be totally picked up from me. It will take a lot of effort not to laugh out loud and encourage him to say it again. Like I did the other day when his newest word was "penis". Do you know how hilarious that sounds when it's coming from the tiny, sweet voice of a not-yet-two-year-old? Penis. Ha! I am still laughing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Because I know you are aching deep in your guts to know, No I did NOT have any luck finding my gr-gr-gr-grandfather Charles at the Family History Library on Tuesday. What is he hiding, that he doesn't want us to find him? I am not afraid of any skeletons in my closet. Just so you know Grandpa Charlie.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I started back to work last week. Do you know what that means? It means I had to dig out the ol' breast pump so I can MILK MYSELF LIKE A DAMN COW while I am there. It is the most pleasant thing I can think of doing while crouched in the corner of whoever's empty office I can dig up. And no, I'm not being sarcastic at all. I LOVE it. You should try it sometime.

But it was nice to be back at work amongst the adults. Even though they aren't as cute when they say penis. (In fact, I am pretty sure they could get fired for saying penis to me at work; especially deliberately to make me laugh.) Speaking of fired, one wacky thing happened-- I found out when I showed up to the office yesterday that my supervisor got fired for stealing money from the agency. Woah! I was not surprised to find out that she had been fired, but to find out that it was for criminal activity and not just the gross incompetence that I'd come to expect from her, was shocking to say the least. Well, good riddance, I say. She liked to take credit for the good things I did, and I won't tolerate that. I am arrogant enough that I will take my OWN credit, thank you very much. I didn't spend 4 perfectionist-to-the-point-of-OCD hours writing that kick-ass report complete with photos and pie charts just to have you tell me that I need to put YOUR name on it, too! Go to hell! Oh, nevermind, you are already going there for breaking that commandment that says YOU SHOULDN'T STEAL! Honestly.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here is the picture of the bracelet I made last week. What do you think? I am thinking of entering it in the State Fair. I could win THREE WHOLE DOLLARS if the old ladies who judge it like it enough! Do you know what you can do with three dollars? Neither do I, so let me know if you come up with any ideas.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Holly tagged me for a new blog game. I promise I haven't forgotten! I will get to it soon. Scout's honor. Girl Scout's honor, anyways. Though I don't know how much that is worth...those damn girl scouts must not have much honor because they keep raising the prices on their damn cookies, and they're so damn good that no one can refuse! Well, the point is, I'll post my response sooner than later.

Owie!

2005-08-29T15:45:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: The very last of the Vanilla Creme Frosted Mini Wheats, and Cran-Vanilla Crunch. I also had some Honeycomb at lunch with my boring peanut butter sandwich. Honeycomb's big, yeah, yeah, yeah!
Current Mood: Tired, and wondering why I spent The Boy's naptime surfing the internet instead of sleeping. Dumbass.

So The Boy took a trip to the Instacare Saturday.

Kitt was mowing the lawn, and The Boy--always interested in anything with wheels-- decided to check it out. No, he didn't get his hand cut off (but wouldn't that be cool to be known as the Mother of the Boy with the Hook-for-a-Hand?), he was burned really badly when he decided to grab a part of it. He's got this MONSTER blister that covers most of his Venus mount (for those of you who DON'T read palms, that the base of his thumb. Yes, I already TOLD you, I read palms. Email me a good scan and I'll see what I can do for you.)

He'll tell you all about what happened, but the only words you will be able to pick out of his gibberish is "burned", and "hot". Pretty cute. Aside from the monster blister. Oh, and the crying.

He's okay now; if only he would leave the bandage on. I've had to wrestle it back onto him four times today after he pulled it off. Keep in mind that this is a two-man operation. And I am home alone. Yeah, so I'm so annoyed with him that I couldn't stop yelling at him this morning. Yes, you can send my Mother-of-the-Year award directly to my house.

In other news, Robin "slept through the night" for the first time Friday night. Slept from 11:00 p.m. to 5:00 a.m.. I would have really enjoyed the sleep that would have given me, but instead we stayed up till 3:00 a.m. having fun with Scott and Sara. I am proud to say I got Sara hooked on making jewelry. She made a very lovely bracelet. I, also, made a masterpiece. I will post a picture as soon as Sara e-mails it to me. (hint, hint. : ) ) The baby slept just as well Saturday night; but wouldn't you know it, DIDN'T last night. I'm sure it's because she knew Kitt had to get up early for work. Alas for me.

Going to the Family History Library tomorrow. Focus all your psychic energies for me on my great-great-great grandfather, Charles. Maybe he'll decide to offer me some help in finding him. I wouldn't mind a personal appearance, but all I really WANT is just some proof of which Charles Foss is MY Charles Foss.

Date Night

2005-08-26T15:41:00.000-06:00

So a week ago today, the Hubby and I were able to go on our first date--without the kids!!-- in a long, long time. A LONG time. Seriously, a very long time. It totally rocked; in a wholesome-married-Mormon-couple way. We had gift certificates to Johnny Carino's and a movie, so we used them both. Sorry Johnny, your restaraunt is good, but it's no Olive Garden. But I will forgive you because it was SO EFFING AWESOME to be in a nice restaraunt without having to wrestle a toddler and bolt our food so we could get out before he started screaming. Yeah. We actually had A CONVERSATION. About STUFF. I died and went to heaven.

The great thing was, my brother and sister-in-law took the kids, and they live close enough to the restaraunt/movie theater that I was able to nurse the baby before we dropped them off, then go eat dinner, then run back and nurse the baby again, then go see our movie. (I would never give up breastfeeding, and in most cases I will argue that it is a zillion times more convenient than formula-feeding--except when you want to go out for more than two hours. But I digress.)

We saw Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I know, not the most romantic of movies to see on our first date in a bajillion years, but it was AWESOME! I liked it way better than the Gene Wilder version, for the most part. The Oompa Loompas were HI-larious, the songs were cool, the kids were perfect. Which reminds me, our dear friends' kid looks EXACTLY like the girl that played Violet Beauregard, except she's like 7 years younger. It was a creepy resemblance.

The best part was, I cried like, three times during the movie. Yes, during Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. I am not kidding. This is what recently having a baby will do to you. Both times Charlie opened his chocolate bar and there was no golden ticket there-- man, the waterworks started. He was just so hopeful about getting a ticket, and he deserved it SO MUCH... and the little boy playing Charlie had such an innocent, wide-eyed look to him. It reminded me of Aiden; and then I could imagine my little boy wanting a golden ticket that much, and how disappointed he would be... I never want to see my kid that disappointed. And it got me all crying, and stuff. There was a little girl sitting next to me in the theater that must have thought I was the BIGGEST FREAK! I'd start to cry, and she'd look over at me, all concerned-like. I think she must have thought I was retarded or something. Because what kind of grown-up cries about a movie that they already know how it's going to end? And THEN when Charlie actually GOT the golden ticket, I sort of gasped, and then started crying all over again. That little girl just LOOKED at me, and then at her dad--as if to say, "trade me seats", and then back at me. It was awesome.

So, thanks again Holly & Dave for taking our kids. I'd forgotten what it's like to go out. Maybe the next step will be actually having sex again. Remember sex? It was awesome.

Yeah, so shut up.

2005-08-26T08:42:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: None yet! Probably Rice Chex because I've been ignoring them, and they'll feel bad if I don't eat them as much as I eat the other cereals. Yes, I'm aware of how weird that sounds.
Current Mood: up

Yeah, so I've sort of been neglecting my blog.

What's it to you? It's my blog!

Okay, okay. More later.

Buy stock in cold cereal if you know what's good for you.

2005-08-17T00:36:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Cran-Vanilla Crunch
Current Mood: A little loopy

I have a new boyfriend. (It's okay, Kitt- he's gay. At least, I think it's okay... is that okay, Josh?) Josh has showered me with a little attention at his blog, and so I am proclaiming my love. What can I say, I'm a little bit of a blog hor.

I stumbled upon Josh's blog and found that he just may be as big a fan of Harry Potter as I am. And I, in turn, am as big a fan of cold cereal as he is. His post has reminded me of just how much I love cereal. And so, in the spirit of love (and all that), here are my top ten most loved cereals*:

Cran-Vanilla Crunch. It's new! I found this most wonderful creation just last week, and it took me only 3 days to finish the box. Alone. And only because I paced myself. I really could have finished it in a day. Craisins, crunchy flakes, vanilla yogurt-y clumps... what's not to love? Sweet enough that you don't have to add sugar, but adult enough to be respectable.
Corn Pops. I have this weird ritual when I eat Pops... I like to eat all the tiniest and broken Pops first, and then when I have a bowlful of just the big ones, I will eat them one by one, smallest to biggest, until I have one left-- the biggest mofo Pop in my bowl. And I savor it.
Frosted Rice Krispies. Weirdly enough, I can only find these at Wal-Mart. I think they are new. I love 'em. I like the small texture, the frosted-ness, and that it makes your milk all sweet when you are done.
Golden Grahams. I recently re-discovered the golden goodness of this mana after a long stint of thinking I didn't like them anymore.
Oatmeal Squares. Man, a box of these weighs 5 pounds. Seriously. I like that it fills you up. While my love for Pops will never die, I have to eat, like, 5 bowls to feel like I can make it to lunchtime.
Honeycomb. 'Cause Honeycomb's big. Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's just so damn big. Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's really just huge. Yeah, yeah, yeah! It's so effin' big...
Maple Frosted Mini-Wheats. I'm a big fan of maple. These smell terrific!
Cocoa Krispies. The wonderful texture and Snap!Crackle!Pop! of regular Rice Krispies, but CHOCOLATE. Duh. And you get chocolate milk at the end! It used to be that Cocoa Puffs was my chocolate cereal of choice, but they've changed them somehow. They are just different lately. Not as good. I can't put my finger on what is wrong. I think it started when General Mills started making all their cereals "healthy". So yeah, Cocoa Krispies.
Raisin Nut Bran. I like the raisins all covered in sweet, nutty clothes. I like to eat all the flakes and stuff first, and leave the raisins till very last. And then I eat the smallest raisins first-- well, you get the idea. This cereal would rank higher on my list, but it has slivers of almonds in it. Not a big fan of plain nuts, and there are SO MANY of them in this cereal. I end up picking half of them out. Also it's expensive, so I don't get it very often.
AlphaBits! Who doesn't love spelling their name (and swear words) with their breakfast? You are a Nazi if you don't.

*Most loved for now. My list changes as frequently as the marshmallows in Luky Charms.

It's me!

2005-08-13T23:01:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Berry Burst Cheerios
Current Mood: Almost asleep

My brother took this picture of me today with his camera phone:

The family met in the park for my grandmother's birthday today. My grandma is...um... interesting. She is in her 70's, but still likes to wear short skirts, go dancing, and get drunk with her boyfriend. A lot of people might think that is totally "rad" of my grandma, but to me it is a little over the top. I think I started feeling this way when I was 17 and she tried to convince me that I could have a baby. She had a baby at 17, after all, and look how it turned out for her! I think that was the same day that she tried to get me to dance the Macarena with her in the Golden Corral parking lot. Uh, no thanks grandma.

A little of this, a little of that.

2005-08-12T11:14:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Golden Grahams & Cocoa Puffs
Current Mood: Blue

11 things I am thinking about right now:

I wish they made Mocha Puffs. I'd totally eat those.
I guess if I want to lose the extra 20 pounds I am hauling around on my ass I need to stop eating 3 bowls of cereal everyday, huh?
I just got my hair cut 2 or 3 weeks ago and already it's too long! I woke up this morning after a hard night with the baby and I looked like a white Don King. All the sides were flattened from laying on them, but the top was sticking STRAIGHT UP. Too bad I don't have a digital camera-- I think you'd get a kick out of my look right now.
If the baby barfs on me ONE MORE TIME I'm going to scream. She spits up so much I've started using receiving blankets and kitchen towels because we run out of burp cloths.
I'd really like to watch the news right now. How boring is that? If I have to watch Bob the Builder or Thomas the Tank Engine or the Little People or Baby Einstein one more time, I'm going to lose my mind.
Did I mention I wish I was in St. Croix? Man, I need a vacation. WITHOUT the kids. (Yeah, like I can leave a breastfed baby while I go on vaca. No, I'm resigned to the fact that it will be YEARS before we get to go anywhere.)
I have lots and lots of beads calling to me. But I have a significant lack of time. I believe it was Scott who said that my kids would never sleep at the same time. They don't. I think they got together and planned it. Doesn't matter--even if they did sleep at the same time, I still wouldn't get to make jewelry. I'd just sleep myself. Nevermind the fact that the house needs to be cleaned like there's no tomorrow, and I never did do my statistics report for my job. I'm surprised my supervisor hasn't called me about it... And here I am blogging instead!
Had a kick-A migraine last night. My head hurt so much that my pillow felt like it was made of cast iron. Glad it's over. Thanks to my hubby who took care of the kids while I tried to sleep it off.
I have ONE pair of pants that fits me. I went out and bought them just so I would have at least one pair. Stupidly, though, I bought pants that are made of linen. If you've ever owned anything linen, you know why this is a problem: They need to be ironed after wearing them for 5 minutes, let alone after they are washed. So there they sit, my one pair of pants that fit me, waiting until I have time to iron them before I can wear them again. I guess what I'm saying is, I effectively have NO pants that fit me. Yesterday I wore pajamas most of the day. I feel so classy.
Last night I picked up the portraits of the Wee One that Shawna had done for me when she was only 10 days old. They are adorable. I want to make birth announcements/blessing invitations with the wallets. Anyone out there have any cute ideas of how to do this?
We still have movie tickets that were given to us last Christmas. I'd love, Love, LOVE to use them tonight. The first person to volunteer gets the glory of being Baby Robin's First Official Babysitter. (Of course, you'd have to take The Boy, too...)

This is my life. Sigh.

2005-08-10T09:59:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Golden Grahams
Current Mood: Wistful

You know the building at the Hogle Zoo where they have the meerkats and the crocodiles and stuff? The "Bubble House"? I just changed The Boy's diaper, and it totally smelled like that building. For those of you in (or from) Utah, I KNOW you totally know what I'm talking about.

Sigh. I wish I was in St. Croix.

Just Because

2005-08-08T13:30:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Life
Current Mood: Hot and tired

Just because I think he's SuperCute, here's a pic of The Boy in my parents' hot tub:

A little business

2005-08-05T14:07:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Special K. With a banana I shared with The Boy.
Current Mood: Meh.

I have updated my links! Now they are separated into Family Blogs, and my Blog Friends. New to the Family Blogs section is my cool brother Dave, and his brilliant wife, Holly. And also in my Blog Friends section is Orion Skie. Welcome to my links, guys!

I realized that I had misread one of the questions from the Tagged Game in my previous post. One of them is 5 things I would do with $100,000,000. I read it as one million, not one hundred million! So here is my updated answer to that:

1) Buy a new house and 2 new cars-- and pay cash!
2) Pay off all my siblings' and parent's and in-laws' houses.
3) Buy a manor on St. Croix; take the whole family there bi-annually. Live there myself during the winter.
4) Travel the world
5) Start my husband's dream business

and I have to have one more. Sorry if that's cheating:
6) Start a charitable foundation for genealogists. It would award grants to genealogists, to pay for travel to the countries their ancestors came from so they could do research there. It would also award money to organizations that could help microfilm and index genealogical records. St. Croix records first! (Do you know how hard it is to research in the Virgin Islands, where all the records I need have been damaged or destroyed by hurricanes?!?)

I was also going to post a picture of my new, super-short haircut. But upon inspecting the pictures, I think I won't. I looked weird in both pictures (not my hair-- my position made my head look freakishly small and my neck freakishly big. The hair looked great!) I am vain enough that I don't want the world (or at least the 8 or 9 people who will ever see my blog) to see me looking anything but hot. No, make that HOTT. I must look hott at all times. (though the new baby is making that increasingly hard. Soooooo tired... Can't...fight...dark under-eye circles....)

Tagged

2005-08-01T14:43:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Special K and Life
Current Mood: Am I ever anything but Tired lately?

Sarah tagged me. Hooray! It’s been a while since I’ve done one of these things:

10 years ago: I had just graduated from high school, and had recently cut my waist-length hair to a chin-length bob-- It shocked a lot of people, and it was very liberating. I was working a temporary job (that later became permanent) at a law firm with my best friend at the time, Diantha. It was my first real job, and I was thrilled about the glamour of working downtown with very professional people. I loved getting dressed up for work, and spending my lunch break walking to the mall. It was also the start of a rather difficult time in my life, but a time of MUCH learning for me.

5 years ago: I was working as the receptionist at the agency I am still with, but things were much different. My old boss was still there, who I loved. One of my life-mentors was still there also, but Bitchy Heather was there, too, and making my life miserable. But my work schedule was such that I had a half-day off once a week, and my mother and I would use that day to go the Family History Library and research our family. Mom and I became very close because of that.
Kitt and I were living in a big house that we had been sharing with another couple. They had just moved out into an apartment because we were in the process of buying a condo; however the sale of that fell through, and so we were house-hunting. That was alternately fun and stressful.

1 year ago: One year ago today was a Sunday, so I was teaching the adult Sunday School class. Can you imagine little old me teaching the scriptures to people who are 2 and 3 times my age? I had that calling for 4 years, and grew to love doing it. I also discovered that I can be a very good teacher if my heart is in it.
I had just quit my job a couple of months ago, so I was still adjusting to being home all day with my then 7-month-old baby. It was a more difficult adjustment than I realized it would be, but it was just what the baby needed. And what I needed, I think.

Yesterday: I took the new baby to church for the first time. It went better than expected, and it was very good to get out of the house. I also went to my mom’s house and we cooked her dinner because she had back surgery last week and can’t move.

Tomorrow: I might take the kids out to my mom’s again and see what I can do to help. I might not make it out of the house again, though—so then I would just be sitting around here. Again. Watching a lot of TV with The Boy while I wait for the Baby to wake up. Again.

5 snacks I enjoy: Oooh, tough question. I will narrow it down to fresh donuts from the Harmon’s Bakery, fresh and warm cookies, anything ice cream, chocolate Twizzlers, and Skittles (or Starbursts—they are interchangeable.)

5 bands/artists that I know the lyrics to most of their songs: U2, Counting Crows (August & Everything, anyways), the Soundtrack to Phantom of the Paradise, Depeche Mode, and Erasure.

5 things I'd do with $100,000,000: Pay off my house and car, buy a new car, take the whole family to St. Croix, go on a second Honeymoon to Italy, and make Kitt quit his job to pursue his dream of designing games and toys.

5 locations I'd like to run away to: St. Croix, Tuscany, Disneyland, San Diego, and Charleston

5 bad habits I have: Being late for everything, swearing too much, not returning calls, going grocery shopping hungry, and not balancing my checkbook (ignorance is bliss)

5 things I like doing: Sleeping (blessed sleep!), surfing the internet, making jewelry, talking to my hubby, taking The Boy fun places

5 thing I will never wear: Thong underwear, platform shoes, a nose ring, a bikini (not anymore, anyways. Stupid stretch marks!) and anything orange.

5 TV shows I like: The Simpsons, King of the Hill, American Idol, Smallville, Scrubs.

5 movies I like: Cold Comfort Farm, Cinema Paradiso, Prince of Egypt, Raising Arizona, and...and...oh! We finally saw National Treasure. I rather liked that.

5 people I'd like to meet: My great-great-great grandfather, my great-great-great-great-great grandmother (it’s a genealogist thing), Gordon B. Hinkley, Bono, and J.K, Rowling.

5 biggest joys at the moment: Washing my baby’s hair, hearing my Boy say “moo”, being able to wear big earrings again because my hair is super-short now (pictures coming!), knowing we’re having pasta for dinner tonight, and that both kids are finally asleep so I can be, too.

5 favorite toys: My Little Ponies, Legos, Spirograph, Adventure People, and Barbie

5 tagged: Failproof, My Stars in the Sky, Stopping Traffic, What Could I Say...?, and Jana’s World

Baby pic

2005-07-28T16:33:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Special K
Current Mood: Got a headache

Here's my girl! Despite her vicious pooping habit, I think she's pretty sweet. I love it when I'm holding her on my shoulder and she decides she's hungry... and turns her face to me and starts sucking on my cheek or neck. Ah, little baby kisses!

Shit.

2005-07-27T18:06:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Honey Bunches of Oats with Peaches
Current Mood: Annoyed

I know I said I would try not to post stories about baby poop and stuff, but this one has me traumatized.

So I was changing the Wee One's diaper the other day--not a big thing anymore since she goes through, like, 30 a day. Needless to say, I've dropped my guard about doing this. With a little boy, you always have to be ready and waiting to get peed on the minute the diaper comes off. The Girl has not had this problem, and so I'm pretty relaxed about changing her. WAS pretty relaxed, I should say.

Like I said, I ws changing the Wee One's diaper. I took the old one off, and turned my head to grab a new one, when I heard this terrible sound that I can only describe as the sound the ketchup bottle makes when you squeeze it hard. You KNOW the sound. Yes, the Girl had let loose her bowels with all the force of a shotgun. There was poop EVERYWHERE. Maybe you are not familiar with the consistency of newborn poo, but it is for the most part a glorified liquid. So yeah, EVERYWHERE. All across the changing table, down the side, all over the carpet and wall.

This was bad enough, but it doesn't end here. I screamed and screamed, and Kitt came running (thanks for helping me, sweetie!) While we are trying to SOP UP this mess, what happens? She pees all over. Great, now she's swimming in a puddle of that, too. At this point I give up trying to salvage her cleanliness and the outfit she's wearing. They are both lost causes; she's getting a bath. So then while I was trying to take her clothes off, guess what?

She poos AGAIN.

I am not kidding.

Fortunately the second time it was not projectile poo, but STILL. How could something that barely weighs 9 pounds have SO MUCH DAMN POO IN HER!?

This might be funny if it were an isolated incident, but it happened again last night, in the middle of the night. The best part? I was attempting to wipe her at the time, so it was all over my hand. Yum, I know. I had to scream for Kitt 3 times before he woke up to come and help me. And of course, in my sleep-deprived and emotionally fragile state, I am CONVINCED that she is doing it on purpose.

So now everytime I change her diaper, I am in constant fight-or-flight mode. It is stressful, to say the least.

whine

2005-07-22T12:47:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Corn Chex
Current Mood: Eff you

SO. DAMN. TIRED.

Harry

2005-07-20T12:21:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Raisin Bran
Current Mood: Tiiiiired

So I finished my Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince yesterday. I spent the entire afternoon bawling like some post-partum freak because of it. It's hard to nurse a baby when you are shaking with sobs. Yup, if effected me that much.

I'd love to talk about it, give my opinions and thoughts on it, but I don't want to spoil the story for anyone. (I remember how bad it sucked when someone spoiled Sixth Sense for me. Man was I pissed!) Let me just say that I was COMPLETELY SURPRISED at who the Half-Blood Prince ended up being; though now in hindsight it was fairly obvious. And I have a theory about who R.A.B. is...

I love my job

2005-07-16T12:01:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Golden Grahams & Multi-Grain Cheerios
Current Mood: Grateful

I have mentioned before that I work as a confidential intermediary for an adoption agency. Most people unfamiliar with the adoption world have no idea what that means-- basically, I help reunite adopted persons with their birth families. It is such an awesome job because I get to use skills that I've learned doing one of my greatest loves in the world-- genealogy. It is also awesome because I get to be involved in the life-altering, powerful moment of such a reunion. It can also be the scariest job in the world, too. I live in dread of the day when I have to go back to my client and say, "Sorry, your birthmother doesn't want to meet you." I have shed more tears over my job than I did when my grandparents died. I throw my whole heart into each reunion, and pray and pray and pray that they turn out right. I rest assured that they all turn out "how they are supposed to"; but I am glad that "how they are supposed to" has so far meant "good".

I am in the middle of putting together the year-end report for my reunion program, and I was asked to include in it quotes from some of my clients about the program. So I have been poring over e-mails I've received in the last year, looking for something that I can include in my report. I came across an e-mail from a client, an adoptee, that I had almost forgotten about, and I cried and cried as I re-read it. It was so cool, I thought I might share some of it with you. (names have been omitted, of course.):

"I don't know if I told you this part of the story -- or if she did. [My birthmother] nearly died this summer. Complications from radiation used to treat cancer had given her a terrible disorder of the colon. She began to lose weight and have trouble getting through her workday. One day, she felt awful and went home a little early, climbed into bed... and just didn't get out. Her niece found her a day or so later. Her kidneys had begun to fail. They admitted her to the hospital, and after surgery she recovered slowly. First in the hospital, then in a nursing home, then finally back in her own home. During her health crisis, her brother came to visit. She was back at home by then and told him about a phone call she'd had a day or two earlier:

A friend of hers had given birth to twins in her early twenties and had given the babies up for adoption. Recently, one of the twin girls had come to her birth mother's house to meet her. It had been a very positive experience, the friend had told her. [My birthmother] explained to her brother that she thought she could never do that -- meet her daughter. "Why not?", he asked her. She replied that she felt she had relinquished the right to know me long ago. Her view was that, when she gave me for adoption, she in effect had made a lasting promise never to know who I was or be involved in my life. It was just part of the deal. [Her brother] encouraged her to think differently. He told her he thought that meeting her daughter, if it ever happened, would probably be wonderful for her. After their talk, [my birthmother] says she told him, "Well, maybe you're right. I might be able to do that."

Becky, your letter arrived the day after this conversation took place.

I do believe in angels, and in the concept I think I may have told you about... perfection in timing. [My birthmother's] gift to me -- her willingness to meet me after 44 years of separation -- is profound. Her healing is a gift from God to both of us. I so easily could have missed the chance to know her. But thanks to divine grace, and the exact timing of your letter, along with your compassionate counseling, she is with me now. Every life makes a difference, and I'm thankful for your life, too, Becky. You can see that you are one of the helping angels in our story."

Aside from being completely humbled by this e-mail, and filled with joy that the reunion turned out and that I was able to help in my small way, I was also blown away by what she said. I had NOT known this story. I had no idea all this was happening. All I knew was that for some reason, I couldn't get a hold of this birthmother by phone no matter how many times I tried. And so I finally sent a letter explaining that her birthdaughter was hoping to open the lines of communication between them. Apparently, this was "how it was supposed to turn out".

Stuff like this happens to me ALL. THE. TIME. as I am doing reunions. And because of it, I've learned to trust the "gut feelings" I get as I am doing each case. I've learned how to wait until the time feels right to make that first call. And I've learned that no matter what *I* think about how a reunion should go, there's always a "higher plan".

I read this e-mail, and I have to ask myself how people can possibly not believe in God.

I am so grateful to Him for the help I get with each case. I realize that I am mucking around in deep, DEEP parts of other people's lives, and I am just so grateful that He keeps me from messing them up. May it always be so.

I have another case coming up really soon...

Little update

2005-07-14T22:46:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Multi-Grain Cheerios
Current mood: Really wishing my husband would go to the Artic Circle and get me that Reeses Pieces shake they are advertising on their marquee.

Well, Baby Robin is a week old today. It's been a tough week, what with the constant crying that I can only partially explain. My poor hubby has gotten through this with flying colors, however. He's a good guy, and I'll fight anyone who wants to say differently. Hey, don't eff with the post-partum woman. Baby's doing great, getting a fat little tummy, and sleeping all the freakin' time. Except at night. Of course. My milk-makers are doing better, thanks wholly to the Wonderful Shawna who had to show me how to breastfeed all over again. (You'd think, after doing it for over a year with my Boy, that I wouldn't have any problems.) And yes Sarah, my CROTCH is actually feeling better, despite the stitches I ended up with. Now that's saying something about how uncomfortable I was!

Now my only complaint is that my neck and shoulders are stiff and incredibly painful because holding, feeding, and burping a baby is making me use muscles that I generally don't use (for my usual activities like surfing the internet for hours on end and reading stories to The Boy). So when the Baby finally falls asleep at night, I can't because I can't find a position to sleep in that doesn't cause needles of pain to shoot up my neck and burrow into my brain. What are you gonna do, though, eh?

On a non-baby-related note, ONLY ONE DAY UNTIL MY HARRY POTTER AND THE HALF-BLOOD PRINCE IS DELIVERED TO MY DOORSTEP!!!!!!! (sorry about the multiple exclaimation points, but I can't stress enough how effing excited I am for this.) When book 5 came out, I had it read in just over 24 hours. I am super depressed that I won't be able to do this with this next book because I am now a parent. A toddler and a newborn just aren't conducive to 24-hour read-a-thons* in the comfort of my bed. It irks me to no end that there will be people in the world who know what happens to dear Harry before I do. Curse them! I hope they get really bad papercuts. And please bless that my mailman will, for some reason he can't explain, bring my book to me before he delivers the mail to the rest of my neighborhood. Oh, mister mustachioed mailman, I will totally make out with you if you do.

Oh, and Lingua Frank has an awesome story posted on his blog. Go there. Seriously.

*(remember having read-a-thons in elementary school? I think I may have been one of a handful of kids who looked forward to these because I actually got to read, ALL DAY.)

Story of Robin's birth

2005-07-11T12:25:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Golden Grahams
Current mood: So tired I can't sleep

First of all, thanks to my Big Bro for posting to my blog for me. How big of a geek does it make you if you are in the frikkin' hospital, and you are wishing for a laptop so you can blog something?

So, I had an interesting day Thursday. Certainly not the day I was planning on; or even expecting. I spent the morning frantically cleaning the house before the Visiting Teachers arrived, and promptly overdid it and got sick. After they left, I got a phone call from my midwife’s office. I was supposed to go in for an appointment at 11:30, but something had been messed up and they were calling to confirm my appointment at 4:30. No problem, I told them—-I can make 4:30 work. My mom was already on her way to my house to watch The Boy while I went to my appointment, so it was too late to ask if she could come later instead, but she was okay staying with him while I had some fun. My best friend is in town from Georgia, and she wanted to take me to get a pedicure for my upcoming stay in the hospital. My first pedicure ever! It was so nice, especially since I haven’t been able to see my toes for a couple of months, let alone take care of them. They’re a lovely wine color now. See?

Our outing took a little longer than expected, so I raced home to pick up The Boy from my mom (she had something else going on that night) and head to my appointment. The Hubby was meeting me there from work, and was just going to watch Aiden in the waiting room while I ran in for my quick pee-in-a-cup-listen-to-the-heartbeat-see-you-next-week appointment. Since I had been walking around dilated to a 4 for three weeks and I hadn’t been feeling any contractions for several days, so I figured nothing would have happened. I didn’t even put my hospital bag in the car “just in case” like I had for my last two appointments because it would have been, yet again, a waste of time. I still had two weeks ‘til my due date anyways.

Imagine my surprise (I think you see where this is going) when my midwife tells me, “You are at a good 5, I can even stretch you to a 6… it’s too dangerous to send you home. You won’t make it back in time. Go across the street to the hospital and we’ll admit you. If we break your water, things will start up within 3 hours.” She swept my membranes, showed me her bloody fingers (I know you wanted to know that!), and said, “Off you go! I’ll meet you there in a few minutes.”

Of course I panicked a little, because we had The Boy with us, I didn’t have my bag (or my Hypnobabies CD’s!), and was I really ready for this? I had to call several people to find someone who was available to run to the hospital to pick up Aiden, and I had to call my mom (who lives a half-hour away and had just arrived home after leaving my house) and tell her to turn around and come back, and could you please pick up my bag from my house? (And my CD’s, and my toothbrush, and feed the cats, and…)

So then we went over to the hospital and checked in. It was a little surreal, I tell you what. We stood at the admission desk for a little bit before the nurses there stopped chatting and asked if we needed help. “Um, I guess I need to be admitted”, I said, not really believing it myself. I think had I been breathing heavy or moaning or other things women in labor are supposed to do, they would have jumped right up to help us. I think they were a little surprised. I was able to ask if there were a nurse on staff who was more familiar with unmedicated births, and we got a great nurse. She was very respectful of my use of hypnosis, and was just plain nice. I told her that my plans had been ruined—I had stuff to make brownies for my nurses, just waiting on my kitchen counter for my labor to begin so I could make them. She laughed, and said that I would only get sub-par care now. (I really WAS disappointed that I didn’t get to do this! Kitt thought I was insane that I planned to make brownies while I was in labor, and then take them to the hospital and say, “Hi, I’m in labor and need to be checked in now; and by the way I made you these brownies…”)

Here's me in labor... not looking as hot as I thought I was, but I am smiling. How many women in labor (*ahem* unmedicated labor) do you know who smiled through most of it? The best part of my story-- they hooked me up to the monitors, and kept asking me whether I was even feeling the contractions they were recording because I didn’t seem to be reacting to them. Well, I WASN’T feeling any contractions! After a while I started feeling pressure, but it was no more than the fake contractions I’d been having for WEEKS. My midwife commented that it was a good thing I was there at the hospital, because if I wasn’t even feeling them, I probably wouldn’t have thought to leave the house until I was nearly ready to push! Yeah, that SO would have happened. (What a mess it would have been, too… I never really realized how much goo is involved in giving birth.)

The midwife broke my water (which she had a difficult time doing because the baby was SO far down in my pelvis—in fact, Little Robin has some big scratches on her head from the hook-thingy they use to do that). After that I started feeling some more pressure. Nothing I couldn’t easily handle, though. And then pretty soon they started to be a little more intense, and I had to start using my hypnosis training for them. It worked beautifully! I would imagine my grandmother, my great grandmother, my gr-gr-grandmother, and my gr-gr-gr grandmother (all now deceased) there in the room with me and putting their hands on my belly; and the angelic light that surrounded them would surround me—that was my anesthesia. I would also "go to my special place” (St. Croix, USVI). It was so nice to be there, talking to my baby, and when the contraction ended I would promise her that I would be back there with her in just a minute when the next one started.

After a little while longer, the contractions started becoming very intense. I remember saying aloud, “Something is different”, and the nurse left to get my midwife. The contractions seemed to be focused more downwards. It was through these contractions that I lost my focus and didn’t feel like I was using my hypnosis. I wouldn’t call it painful—-more of a super intense spasm that seemed to envelop my whole body. I couldn’t seem to relax. All I wanted to do was writhe around until it stopped. I didn’t writhe around, but I was definitely tensing up. Kitt was SO wonderful during this part, trying to get me to relax, and telling how great I was doing. OMG, I love him SO MUCH!

I remember thinking that I didn’t want to do this anymore; but I recognized these contractions as the start of the pushing phase. So I knew they would soon be over and I was very close to having my baby. These contractions didn’t last more than 15 or 20 minutes before I started pushing. And once I started pushing, I honestly don’t remember feeling any contractions at all-—I was just pushing whenever fancy dictated. It only took 15 minutes of this, and I heard my midwife say, “Look down now!”

Before I could even look down, she was putting my little girl into my arms. Robin didn’t even cry, she just looked at me. It was so sweet, and I will never forget that moment. She started nursing right away, and my nurse was able to get me more time than usual before they sent her up to the nursery so I could do that. The other awesome part was that since I was unmedicated, they let me go with Kitt to the nursery to see her first bath! No one else I know has been able to do that. A little bit of bragging rights for me, I think.

So they broke my water around 5-ish, and little Robin Rae was born at 8:14 p.m. It only took 3 hours start to finish! All went well, and it was overall a very good experience. Definitely intense. Now I am exhausted and my nipples are VERY sore (you wanted to know that, too—-I know, don’t thank me), but happy to have my little girl, and happy not to be pregnant anymore (I was so excited to sleep on my back again!). I truthfully was expecting to go into labor on Saturday, so I have been in somewhat of a state of shock that she is already here. And my husband has been bragging about me and Hypnobabies to anyone that asks about the birth. He is so proud of me! Heck, I’m so proud of me!

Here are some cute pictures:

And as promised, here is the Pink Room, all done now. It is nice to sit in there and nurse my new baby.

I guess I don't need to tell you that I may be a little slow in posting to my blog. I will try to post about more interesting things than baby poop when I do post; but forgive me as I don't get out much anymore. I'm tired now... I think I will wash the baby barf off of me and take a nap.

Baby Robin

2005-07-09T15:42:00.000-06:00

We mourn the passing of Pre-Natal, Hormonal Becky Davis and welcome the new and improved Post-Natal, Hormonal Becky Davis back into the world. Yes, Baby Robin was born on July 7th, 2005 at 8:14 pm.

In this corner, weighing in at 7 pounds 15 ounces and 19 inches long, we have for the first time in the ring, Robin Rae Davis!! And in this corner, weighing in around 24 pounds (or so?) her big brother Aiden!! How will he handle this new menace in the house? What will he do without all the attention? Only time will tell! LET'S GET READY TO RUMBLE!!!

Beck is still in the Hospital until sometime this afternoon, so I, her cool brother Bryan, am letting her blogging world know the good news.

Visit from Cirith Ungol

2005-07-05T13:00:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Crispix
Current mood: Tired, as always. My belly hurts, my CROTCH hurts, my back hurts, and my heart hurts a little.

So we finally, finally, thank God, finished the Pink Room. Stripes and everything! I would totally post a picture, but I suck and don't have a digital camera. Maybe my awesome brother Bryan will come over and take a picture so I can post it. I gotta say, I was a little nervous about the whole thing once we were well into the project, but with the chair rail up and the crib together and in there, it looks great.

Speaking of the crib, it is a hand-me-down (like all the other furniture in our house save our kitchen table, a bookshelf, and our tv & entertainment center). It has been sitting in our spider-infested garage for 3 or 4 months now. Seriously, I won't even go into our garage because we've killed way too damn many black widows out there. Spiders themselves are nasty deamons of Satan, but POISONOUS spiders... well, I believe they may actually be Satan himself. So back to the crib-- Kitt brings it in so we can set it up. We're about done with the painting; all is going well. This crib, though, is made of hollow metal tubes. Given my paranoia about spiders, I am surprised I didn't expect it and insist each tube be examined thoroughly before allowing it entrance into the house. Yup, a spider had been living in one of the crib rails, and made it's way out, and INTO MY BABY'S ROOM! This was not just a spider, though-- it was @%$^&%^# SHELOB. It wasn't black widow, but it was the absolute most disgusting thing I have ever, ever seen. It was huge. It was sickly yellow-white, like it had been living in a hole for 40 years. It had a GIANT butt, and long, icky, wiggly spider legs. I stood there paralyzed with fear, only able to emit little squeaks after my initial scream. Kitt's dad, who I think was clueless about my extreme spider phobia, looked at me weird and then bent over and PICKED IT UP!! (not with his bare hands, I will concede-- He had a piece of plastic dropcloth that he used... but the fact that he got that close to it made me throw up a little in my mouth.) And then the WORST PART OF ALL... Not only did he pick it up WITH HIS HAND, he then SQUISHED it. With his hand. And the POP/SQUISH of that @%^!$ enormous, @^$@*# ugly spider being squeezed in between somebody's fingers, was all I could take. I fled the room, and couldn't stop gagging and shivering afterwards.

Dammit, I HATE spiders!

But yeah, the good news is, the Pink Room is finished. Baby Robin can come any time now. Aaaany time. 1...2...3...NOW! Nope. Okay, how about...NOW! No? Okay....NOW! Please? Pleeeeaaase?

Dear Taco Bell,

2005-06-30T23:15:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Honey Nut Cheerios
Current Mood: Waning

Yes, we've had some good times... but I think it's time we started seeing other people. We've been going out so long that I didn't realize it was no longer about the love... lately it's only been about the cheapness. Your bean burritos have too many re-hydrated onions and there is no flavor to speak of. And I can't tell you how many times I've found creepy veins and things in your taco meat. I've overlooked these little indiscretions of yours because I've been committed to making our relationship work-- but honestly, I just can't do it anymore. You've been sacrificing ameri-mexican goodness for stupid ideas that only last a little while. Why not focus on the old standbys and make them better? You've let yourself go. And frankly, I'm disappointed in you. Sometimes I'm embarrassed to be seen with you.

No, Taco Bell, it's just not going to work out anymore. I've met someone new, who does things for me like you never did. Del Taco and I are very happy together. He makes me feel special. He never grosses me out, and he doesn't make me ill within 2 hours of gettin' it on like you did. And that glorious green sauce!

I hope you will find someone new, too-- someone that makes you feel as happy as Del Taco makes me feel. You're a good guy, but I need someone who takes care of me. Don't worry, we can still be friends.

Sorry, Scott

2005-06-29T09:42:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Frosted Rice Krispies & Honey Nut Cheerios
Current Mood: Indifferent

Sorry Scott, it's now 9:42 a.m. on 6/29. No Peanut M&M's for you.

News, you suck.

2005-06-28T18:17:00.000-06:00

So, here's a direct quote from my midwife today: "It could be any day, it could be in two weeks."

So there you go. I was really hoping that she would say, "Oh my, you are having the baby right now! Hurry and drive across the street to the hospital and I will meet you there!" I seriously even brought my hospital bag in the car, just in case. Guess I'm an idiot.

I also have something to say to our local news stations: The NBA draft is NOT, I repeat NOT "BREAKING NEWS!!!!!". Breaking news is the president dying, or a tornado hitting downtown Salt Lake City, or something BIG like that. Do NOT interrupt The Simpsons with your lame-ass basketball so-called Breaking News.

Frikkin' HUGE

2005-06-28T11:55:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Frosted Rice Krispies (seriously, you gotta try these!)
Current Mood: Amused

You all laugh when I say how big I am. I know it. Well here's proof for you:

Gettin' bigger by the SECOND

Need to see it again?

Tummy close-up

I have an appointment with my midwife this afternoon. We'll see what she says about how close I am now. The full moon is tonight... could that be what I need to get this labor started?

I wouldn't mind it happening this afternoon. And let's be honest-- it's because I have make-up on today. How girly am I, that I won't leave the house without make-up on, even to FREAKIN' HAVE A BABY!? The way I look at it, Pictures WILL be taken. I must look as hot as possible at all times. Can you just see it? Me, making a "pushing with all my might" face (imagine your worst "poo-ing face", and times it by 10) but beautifully made up? It'll be great.

Just Waiting

2005-06-26T15:36:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Frosted Rice Krispies & Corn Pops
Current Mood: Bored

No baby yet.

I'm starting to feel like I'm letting people down because everyone is expecting her to come, like, YESTERDAY. Last night I was trying to go into labor through the sheer force of my willpower; but I will freely admit that it was because Kitt had to speak in church today, and I had to teach a Sunday School lesson, and neither of us wanted to prepare for it. I guess that's allright. Tomorrow will mark 37 weeks, which is officially full-term. I guess I'm glad that she made it this far so she can be big and healthy. But I'm admittedly tired of this huge belly in the way of EVERYTHING.

Still working on the pink room. If we could just stop running out of tape, we could probably get it done! I will post a picture when it is all finished, so everyone can ooh and ahh.

Muh?

2005-06-24T12:17:00.000-06:00

So, I don't get many people coming to my blog from search engines. But today I got one coming from Yahoo. What did they search for to get here?

Becky's butt.

I hope they found what they were looking for. I guess I should have posted that picture of me on "Half-Nekkid Thursday".

Livin' in a Hell Hole!

2005-06-24T12:07:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Honey Nut Cheerios
Current Mood: Irritated, annoyed, aggravated, bothered, frustrated-- pick one!

I suppose this is what they call "Nesting". Apparently one of the signs of impending labor is a mad urge to clean everything and make sure everything is pretty and ready for a new baby. I'm SO feeling this today. I would like to clean the whole house, BUTT, I have a small Boy following behind me making messes faster than I can clean them up. And I'm just exhausted. It ain't easy walking around with a bowling ball in my crotch, let alone trying to clean and do laundry and paint a bedroom and pack a bag. I just want someone to take the Boy away for about 24 hours so I can get everything done that I need to. Is that too much to ask?

Just an update

2005-06-23T15:31:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Cocoa Puffs
Current Mood: Achey all over (that's not really a mood though, is it?)

So I went to my midwife today. I am dialated to a 4 now. Sorry Shawna, I doubt I'll make it to July 3rd. It's looking like Scott's is going to be the closest guess on when the baby will come. Maybe I will send him some Peanut M&M's as a prize. Though why he'd want to poison his body with those is beyond me. Give me Skittles any day.

That reminds me... when I was in the office yesterday I noticed that the vending machine had been refilled. Hooray! And holy crap, the guy had put some Good N' Plenty in there. I LOVE those! Black licorice is SO yummy. But have you ever noticed how it turns your poo an unnatural shade of blueish-green? The only bad thing is that he is still putting in lots of trail-mix type stuff. Look dude, no one wants your health food. Put more of those ginormous pink-frosted sugar cookies in there. You know, the ones that have, like, 36 grams of fat per cookie? Yeah, those'd be HOT.

Oh yeah, he's also upped the price on the Hostess stuff from 80 cents to a dollar. Bastard.

On another note, I have two words for anyone with infants or toddlers. Baby Einstein. Man, our kid will sit and watch those for HOURS if I let him. It's a good way to get a half hour to cook dinner or something. One Saturday morning we put Aiden in front of a Baby Einstein DVD and ran into the other room for a quickie. AWESOME. Right now he's watching Baby Neptune. Sure I might be a bad mother for letting my kid watch TV, but you try being 9 months pregnant and running after a toddler all day. I bet you will swallow your criticism in a SECOND. Hypocrite.

Why does #@$^ like this only happen to ME?

2005-06-21T09:25:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Frosted Rice Krispies & Fruity Pebbles
Current Mood: Freaked out

So I was just trying to put on my shoe, and a big ugly spider crawled out of my shoe and almost ate me. Seriously.

Why does this only happen to me?

It seems like people who AREN'T afraid of spiders never see the little bastards; but I, I who am deathly afraid of them, am always having face-offs. Watch your back you 8-legged freaks...

Same goes for meat. People who aren't squeamish about meat never have problems. But whenever I get brave enough (or hungry enough) to eat flesh, I find a big ol' ugly vein sticking out of my next bite. Or I find a piece of cartiledge the size of a small truck in my hamburger. Crap like that.

Stupid spider. Now I'm a-scared to put on my other shoe.

Birthday?

2005-06-20T12:48:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Cocoa Puffs and Frosted (?!) Rice Krispies (Surprisingly good! A new fav, I think)
Current Mood: Sleepy and anxious

So I was totally having contractions this morning. I even made Kitt wait a little while before leaving for work so we could decide whether this was the Big Day or not. The contractions stopped after breakfast, so Kitt left. I went to the store, though, and picked up several things that I need for the stay in the hospital. I've had a few contractions on and off, but it looks like Robin will wait a little longer.

Today's episode made me realize how woefully unprepared I am. Mentally I'm prepared, but physically... Among many other things, we still need to finish painting the Baby's room. We chose to paint stripes on the lower half of the wall. Aren't we ambitious? But that's Kitt and I to a "T". If we're going to do something creative, we're going to go All Out. We're having the family over to our house tonight for dinner instead of the weekly night at my mom's, so hopefully the Fam can either help us paint, or at least keep the Boy occupied while we finish.

I liked Scott's post today. I can SO relate.

Baby Stuff

2005-06-16T14:34:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: the very last little bits of Cheerios, and the very last little bit of Apple Jacks. Then I dumped the Apple Jacks crumbs into my milk because it made it all sweet and apple-y.
Current Mood: Relaxed

So I am in the office today, but not to work. And I am sans Boy, hence the relaxed mood. Crazy how that is. I am here for a baby shower (Yippee! Presents!) that the gals at the office are throwing for me. As much as I complain about how weird it can be working in an office of ALL WOMEN (stinky bathrooms, hormone-induced catfights, lots of crying), there are also perks. Like baby showers and the occasional potluck lunch. If my boss were a man, you can bet your ass he wouldn't approve holding a baby shower in the conference room on company time.

In other news, I went to an appointment with my midwife on Monday. She checked me, and I am already dialated to almost a 3! This is good and bad... good, because I am already doing half the work of labor and I don't even know it. I won't have to go from 0 to 10 in the hospital; just 3 or 4 to 10. The bad news is, this baby will probably be coming a lot sooner than expected. I say probably because it's very possible that I could walk around dialated to a 3 for several weeks; however, the way I am feeling and the way the baby is positioned and is moving, all signs point to sooner than later. This is bad because #1, she's not done cooking yet. I still have 5 weeks until my due date, and she won't be considered full-term for another 2 weeks. And #2, because my bestest friend is coming in from Georgia to pamper my pregnant ass, but she won't be here until the 3rd of July (See you soon, Sweet Shawna!)

So I am now taking everyone's bets on what day you think Little Robin will be born. I'll send you something cool if you get it right on.

One more thing... I noticed yesterday when I was working in the office that the vending machine guy has put those disgusting red Zingers in our machine. You know, the ones that are all coconut-y? Seriously, who eats those? And wouldn't you know that he put the Hostess Cupcakes right behind them! This guy needs to be shot. And by the way, vending machine guy, stop putting crackers and nuts in the machine. More Skittles! How about some Starbursts? And would it kill you to come and fill it more often? By the end of the month all that is left is SweetTarts, Tootsie Rolls, and nuts. No one is taking that bait.

To my Sweetheart

2005-06-12T23:42:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Raisin Nut Bran and Apple Jacks
Current Mood: Nesting

It occurred to me, looking back over my blog, that my last several entries are very negative. I realize that blogs are often places to rant-- especially when you are like me and don't ever complain to anyone to their face, and you need a place to let off steam. But I don't want to come off looking like a whiner and complainer. Let's blame it on the hormones, shall we?

So I thought I would leave a positive post here for once.

I want to tell the world how wonderful my husband is. He does so much for me that I will never be able to repay him! Here are 25 wonderful things about my Hubby:
1) He is my best friend.
2) We are soul mates! We are so often the same person that we rarely fight.
3) We can usually read each other's minds.
4) He takes care of The Boy when I am too tired, even when he is also tired from working all day.
5) And then on top of that he will cook dinner (he is an awesome cook)!
6) He is a good father.
7) He is kind to everyone, and I admire him so much for that.
8) He is patient with me,
9) and patient with almost everyone else.
10) Everyone who knows him thinks that he is a pretty decent guy.
11) He is creative
12) and smart,
13) a little arrogant,
14) and funny.
15) He has a wonderful sense of humor.
16) He likes my cats;
17) and on top of that, he is kind to ALL animals. (So few men are; it was one of the things that I fell in love with him over.)
18) He is a good tipper,
19) He has an adorable smile,
20) and occasionally I am the one to make him laugh- genuinely laugh. I love when I can do that.
21) He humors my weird ideas
22) and he has just as many hobbies as I do.
23) He believes in me,
24) he brings me donuts and shakes,
25) and when I can't sleep, all it takes is for him to touch me and I feel secure enough to fall asleep.

The Hubby and The Boy

I love you Kitty!

Update

2005-06-11T22:41:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Wheat Chex, Cheerios, and Apple Jacks (I was hungry, okay? Shut up!)
Current Mood: a little nervous

The Pink Room is halfway done!

Duh, I'm a big fat idiot! Uh-hyuck!

2005-06-09T13:56:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: None! We are out of milk! So I had a Wal-Mart donut instead. I am not satisfied.
Current Mood: Annoyed.

My supervisor is a bona fide idiot.

I am in the office ONE DAY A WEEK-- Wednesdays. She has been fully aware of this since I started this schedule a year ago. Yesterday she catches me in the hall and says that she needs a whole bunch of games made up to take with her to a conference she is going to this weekend. Oh, and she's leaving tonight.

The games she is talking about are these cheesy, feel-good social worker-type games where everyone is supposed to share their feelings and be lovey and sweet (and it's all a bunch of sh*t!). She came up with the idea a couple of years ago, and me-- being a whiz at Microsoft Publisher-- made them up for her. Since then, it's been my job to put these games together. We usually give them out to members of our support groups, so I make up about a dozen of them every few months. Let me tell you, it is a pain in the butt to put these together. I have to collate 60 cards for each game, print out labels for the inside and outside of each box, trim the labels, attach them, print out and cut out an instruction card for each game, buy dice, and assemble it all. Putting together a dozen usually takes me 2 or 3 hours.

She wanted 30 to take with her. AND SHE'S LEAVING TONIGHT, she says.

Oh sure, I can do that--no problem. Here, let me just pull down my pants and PULL THEM OUT OF MY BUTT FOR YOU!!!

What an idiot. Could she not have called me about it a week ago? Even Tuesday night would have been fine. I could have had them all done and brought them to work with me yesterday, and there would be no crisis to deal with. Instead she waits until the LAST FREAKIN' MINUTE, like an idiot. So now the Big Boss, who is also going to the conference but not leaving until tomorrow, has to make a special trip into the office to pick them up, and I had to bust my butt trying to get them there in time for her this morning. AND I had to bring The Boy into the office with me, which is always an adventure. And I don't mean the type of adventure where you stumble onto treasure while making a sandcastle on your Carribean vacation. I mean the type of adventure with spiders and poison darts coming at you, and you lose 3 of your men, and you come out missing an eye or something.

So I spent last night putting these damn games together when I should have been playing Galactic Battlegrounds with the hubby. Or painting the pink room. Or something else. ANYTHING else. The plus side is that I get paid for the time it takes me to put them together. And I was NOT shy about double-billing the time that my husband spent helping me so I could get to bed before midnight, I tell you what.

*grumble, grumble*. Idiot.

More Bitching

2005-06-07T14:23:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Cheerios and Crunch Berries
Current Mood: Better that Sunday, but not much.

Didn't sleep again last night. The Boy woke up practically every hour, and screamed to be comforted. He's almost 18 months old for hell's sake! When does this end? There better be something seriously wrong with him, or I will sell him to the gypsies for being defective about sleeping.

I tried to take a nap just now while The Boy was napping, but the white trash kids who live behind us were outside playing. From what I could tell, they were playing a game that consisted of loud, LOUD girly shrieking every 4 seconds. Or maybe they were just pushing the littlest sister too high in the swing or something. At any rate, they suck and I wish they'd move to Alaska. Or maybe Canada.

Still haven't started painting the pink room. Totally lack the energy, let alone the free time where The Boy isn't pulling on my leg to take him for a 12-mile walk around the neighborhood. One good thing is that it has been rainy the last two days, so I couldn't do the walk-thing. The downside is the whining that has resulted from that. I HATE the sound of his whine. Why can't he laugh more? That's a really cute sound.

I want to talk to you all about Dr. Suess, but I need a scanner first to illustrate my point. Look for that post soon.

Humph.

2005-06-05T17:01:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Wheat Chex and Crunch Berries
Current Mood: Shut up. Stop asking me.

If I could get more than 4 hours of sleep a night, I would probably feel more like blogging. As it is, all I feel like doing is punching stuff.

It doesn't help that my in-laws spent the weekend over at my house moving furniture around so we can make a room for the baby. It was very, very nice of them; and not that I don't appreciate it (because I am too damn big and tired to do it myself), but my mother-in-law is rather agressive about cleaning and throwing things away. So everything is moved, and I can't find a damn thing and it is making me more irate. If that is possible.

In other news, we bought pink paint. Never thought I'd have a pink room. Hope it doesn't look like the Easter Bunny barfed all over the walls when we are done.

As of tomorrow I will be 34 weeks pregnant. Here is what "The Internet" says about my pregnancy this week:
Fetal Development:
The baby responds as a newborn with its eyes open while awake and closed while sleeping. S/he is developing immunities to fight mild infection. Those sharp little fingernails are at the ends of the fingertips already, and you might need to clip them during the first few days after birth.

Maternal Changes:
You've probably felt some Braxton Hicks contractions for the past several weeks but they may intensify now. They are usually painless and non-rhythmical. These are preparing your body for the real thing.

Ideas for Dad:
Mom is feeling huge and clumsy now. She may be weepy and vulnerable or extremely moody. Tell her how beautiful she is and what a wonderful mom she'll be. Serve her breakfast in bed and help her feel like the special woman she is.

I like the dad idea. I am not only feeling huge, I AM huge. See?

Damn, I'm huge!

And I can't stop crying at stupid, stupid things. My husband does so many nice things for me when I ask him to, but sometimes I wish he'd surprise me one day with something that will make me feel special. Food is good. It's been like 8 years since I got flowers. A day at the library would kick ass. I guess I never do anything for him, though, so why should he have to for me? Just because I cry doesn't mean I should get presents. (The Boy would beg to differ, I'm sure.)

Here, one more picture for you:

Me and The Boy

I'm CAMPING, people! I don't have any makeup on, and my face is getting fat. Deal with it, and tell me I'm pretty.

Baseball

2005-06-01T17:31:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Wheat Chex and Cocoa Puffs
Current Mood: Terrified beyond belief

I got an e-mail yesterday from my boss. She had received a letter of complaint from an adoptive father who was angry because his daughter had requested help from us in reuniting with her birthmother back in February, but nothing had been done about it and they hadn’t heard from us.

I was never good at baseball. I couldn’t catch the ball, and if I did, I always dropped it. It appeared as though life had hit a pop fly in my direction, and what did I do? I dropped the ball.

It was totally my fault. I had put the daughter’s request aside because I needed to clarify something about it, and I just plain forgot about it. I had to get up in the night to pee at least 4 times, and The Boy woke us up 4 additional times (he’s cutting a molar, poor kid—though I don’t feel so sympathetic at 2 in the morning...), and after that any sleep I might have gotten was chased away by this huge mistake I made.

I worried all night. And all morning as I got ready for work, I had visions of being fired. I rehearsed what I would say. I felt angry. I felt scared. I felt sad. I felt sick with worry.

I ran into my boss’s office first thing upon arriving at the office. She held up the letter she got, and before she could say anything I launched into an apology so big I could barely breathe by the time I reached the end of it. I took full responsibility. I had just forgotten about the case. It was unprofessional of me, it was careless of me, and I was willing to do nearly anything to make up for it.

My boss can be a rather harsh woman. Most people in the office are scared to go to her with their problems because she seems to have so little empathy. She’s not afraid to give you what-for, and she does it on a regular basis. And she has this way of looking at you over her glasses... I make fun of that look, but admittedly it scares to poo out of me.

So what did this harsh and intimidating woman say when I was done with my groveling?

“Becky, you have just raised a level or two in my esteem for having the courage to admit to your mistake. My gosh, most people would try to talk their way out of it or find a way to blame it on someone else! That was very good of you. Welcome to human-kind.”

Home run! And the crowd goes wild!

Of course, as part of my penitence I volunteered to call the irate father rather than make the Boss come up with an apology letter. More than just about anything else besides spiders and earwigs, I am afraid of confrontation. I am an honest-to-goodness wuss, even though I try to be tough by doing things like going through natural childbirth. What if he yells at me? What if he threatens to discredit me or the agency? What if he wants me to bow to demands I can’t possibly meet? I’m so scared!

I am up to bat, and all I have is a wiffle bat and no helmet. Holy crap am I scared.

Religion-- BEWARE!

2005-05-27T16:36:00.000-06:00

Took this test at Beliefnet.com that tells you what organized religions your beliefs most closely match. I thought the results were interesting. Here is what it had to say about me:

The top score on the list below represents the faith that Belief-O-Matic, in its less than infinite wisdom, thinks most closely matches your beliefs. However, even a score of 100% does not mean that your views are all shared by this faith, or vice versa.

Belief-O-Matic then lists another 26 faiths in order of how much they have in common with your professed beliefs. The higher a faith appears on this list, the more closely it aligns with your thinking.

Your Results:
1. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (100%)
2. Jehovah's Witness (90%)
3. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (80%)
4. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (78%)
5. Bahá'í Faith (74%)
6. Orthodox Judaism (63%)
7. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (58%)
8. Sikhism (56%)
9. Eastern Orthodox (54%)
10. Roman Catholic (54%)
11. Orthodox Quaker (48%)
12. Islam (47%)
13. Liberal Quakers (45%)
14. Reform Judaism (45%)
15. Seventh Day Adventist (45%)
16. Hinduism (43%)
17. Unitarian Universalism (36%)
18. New Thought (33%)
19. Jainism (30%)
20. Theravada Buddhism (30%)
21. Mahayana Buddhism (28%)
22. Neo-Pagan (26%)
23. Scientology (25%)
24. New Age (22%)
25. Secular Humanism (16%)
26. Nontheist (14%)
27. Taoism (11%)

Walk a mile in my shoes

2005-05-27T09:40:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Rice Chex and Count Chocula
Current Mood: Worn out!

Before it was even 9:00 I had walked a mile this morning. That is really, really good considering my idea of strenuous exercise is sweeping the kitchen floor.

I've actually been doing this for several weeks now (though usually not so early-- but it's getting too hot later in the day!). I made the "mistake" of introducing a morning walk into The Boy's routine, and now he won't let me skip a day without going for a walk. And one trip around the block won't suffice; no, not for This Boy. So we end up walking a mile before I am completely worn out and my disgustingly stretched-out belly muscles are just aching. It used to make me really bitter and mad that I had to do this everyday to appease The Boy, but now I am looking at it differently: I have the physical equivalent of a marathon coming up in 7 weeks or so-- If I can't leisurely walk a mile, how am I going to give birth? So now I am looking at it as training. Sure, it still hurts and it still sucks and I'm tired the rest of the day, but it will make things so much easier for my birthing time.

That's what everyone keeps telling me, anyways. They'd better not be lying to me or I will punch them all in the throat. I can do it, you know-- I've been training.

Not even trying

2005-05-25T14:07:00.000-06:00

Today’s Cereal: Rice Chex
Current Mood: Unmotivated

Sarah asked me if I liked the New Star Wars. While I think of a response, why don’t you get to know me better?

10 Random things I like:
Skittles
Driving fast with U2 playing loud
The Internet
Simpsons (but not the last few seasons—it’s not funny anymore, it’s just gotten weird)
Compliments
Honeybutter
Sleeping in
The Boy’s laugh
My husband’s goatee
Soft, warm cookies

10 Random things I don’t like:
People who talk too much
People who touch me (unless I know you well)
The nasty “woman-smell” of the office bathroom (25 women share that bathroom…)
Undercooked meat
Being in an elevator with other people
People talking to me stall-to-stall while I am going to the bathroom.
Dirt under my fingernails
Rap
Wind blowing my hair
Filing

Everyone is an idiot. Don't talk to me.

2005-05-23T08:55:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Rice Chex and Multi-Grain Cheerios
Current mood: Don't touch me. Don't even look at me.

I have been a bit lazy with my blog of late, and I apologize. Really, nothing has happened that I have considered blog-worthy. So today I will just bitch and moan.

I am officially 32 weeks along now. That means that I only have 8 more weeks to go! (although in reality I really only have 6 or 7 weeks to go...) Time has really, REALLY flown by, and I am feeling overwhelmed at all the crap I have to do before the baby comes. However, when you live with a 1-year-old, either nothing gets done, or everything you do gets UNdone. My boy is a cutie-poo, but I am getting tired of him. I think I need a cryogenic baby freezer. Then I can pull him out and unthaw him when I am less tired, grumpy, fat, and tired. Does it make me a bad mother for wanting that?

Why do designers of maternity clothes insist on making things with horizontal stripes? Please, I'm already the size of a small dump truck. Can't you do someting to HIDE that, rather than emphasize it? And stop making so much pink. Nobody likes it.

Things NOT to say to a pregnant woman (Things I would like to say in return are in italics):
1) Damn! You're HUGE! (Thank you, Rico Suave. You have won my heart. Let's make out. Retard!)
2) You look beat. (So what you're really saying is, I look like shit?)
3) You look ready to pop! (Actually, dumb-ass, I still have 8 weeks to go. What insensitve thing are you going to say to me in 7 weeks when I'm still around?)
4) Wow, you are carrying that baby really low! (Yes. Yes I am. Now stop looking at my crotch.)
5) Oh, are you having a baby? (Oh, have you had a lobotomy? Don't be an idiot.)
6) Are you STILL here? (No, I'm just a hologram of the real me, who is home nursing my new baby. Can't you see the big H on my forehead?)
7) Geez, you are really getting big... (you too, fatty. Makes you feel good, doesn't it?)

I could go on and on with these. I think I'll start actually writing down the things people say to me. That will be fun.

My last gripe is that I can't sleep because I either have to pee, my back hurts, I'm getting kicked in the hip bone, or it's too damn hot and for some unexplainable reason the husband has turned the fan off. Or my legs are wigging out. This last one is a reecent development, and I don't like it ONE BIT. I will just be drifting off, and then my feet and legs suddenly NEED to move. They ITCH to move. It is SO DAMN ANNOYING!! I was practicing one of my childbirth hypnosis cd's last night and my legs kept doing that. Made it REALLY hard to relax.

The Boy just discovered that he has a belly button. It was the cutest damn thing I have ever seen. So I will retract my wish for a cryogenic baby freezer. For now.

Blood is thicker than a lot of things

2005-05-18T15:31:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Honey & Nut Chex
Current Mood: Exhausted

I facilitated another reunion yesterday. It left me in a really good mood (which was promptly destroyed this morning when The Boy started the day off by whining and never stopped...) This reunion was awesome. The birthparents were a married couple who had 8 kids at home already, and just could not afford the one more they were expecting. Very sad that they had to make a hard decision like giving up a child based on money, but it happens a lot. Although both the birthparents have died, I was able to connect my client to her oldest sister, who in turn told all the rest of the siblings. They didn't know about her, so they were shocked to say the least-- but it was a good surprise. They cried with joy, and have begun to welcome her into their large clan. I am so pleased that it went well! My client couldn't stop giggling (she's 50!) after I told her that her sister was going to call her that night. I was thrilled for her.

Aren't you a little short for a stormtrooper?

2005-05-16T13:40:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Golden Grahams & Multi-Grain Cheerios
Current Mood: surprisingly upbeat!

First things first. TOTALLY check this out.

Okay, so last week my coworkers were asking me if I was going to see the new Star Wars this Thursday. I am famous around the office for taking the day off to see big movies open. I did it for all the other Star Wars, and for the Lord of the Rings movies (Except for the 2nd one which opened 1 day after Aiden was born. Um, yeah... a little busy for that one.); I did it for the Harry Potters and for Spiderman. It is AWESOME!! I freakin' LOVE going to the first day of big, long-awaited shows. I think I have blogged about this before... there is just so much EXCITEMENT floating around the theater, you can practically smell it. (Depending on the movie, sometimes you actually CAN smell it. Ewww!)

I had actually forgotten that the movie opens this week, but not wanting to tarnish my reputation, I said yes. They asked if I had tickets yet, and when I said no, they all laughed and said, "oh, you probably won't be going then. I hear everything's sold out."

Oh, ye of little faith.

Not to mention little brains. Checked out what's available on Fandango.com on Saturday, and there were still TONS of tickets available. So we're set to go on Thursday at 12:45 with my brother and his wife. I wonder how many people AREN'T taking to chance ot go see it opening day because they think everything's sold out? If you are among that crowd, I suggest you do a little research. It is TOTALLY worth it. When you are sitting in a packed theater and the Lucas Films logo comes up on the screen and the audience goes Ape-shit-- well, there is nothing quite like it. And at the end, when everyone claps. I LOVE it when people clap at the end of a movie. Happens so rarely.

Anyway, my co-workers assuming everything was sold out reminds me of the time when they had released the updated original Star Wars into the theaters. I was going to the Community College at the time, and had met "Ed" in my drawing class. (I really should have known at the time... be wary of ANYONE named Ed.) He seemed like a nice guy; he was interesting to talk to, he OBVIOUSLY liked me, I felt comfortable with him, and Kitt was on a mission at the time and I was lonely. So I went out with him several times. And then I realized that he was, in fact, an idiot-loser-drop out with little art talent and even less knowledge of U2, despite his claim of being a "huge fan".

The first time I went out with him though, was to a party. He was a big-time Star Wars geek, and was really excited about seeing the digitally remastered version when it came out. But because he was an idiot-loser-drop out, he didn't look into getting tickets until it was too late. So he threw together a last-minute Star Wars party where we were going to watch all three original movies. All his friends were set to come, lots of them were bringing MORE people-- it was gonna be a "rockin' good time". He invited me, and like I said, I was lonely. So I went.

It was a little odd when I pulled up to his parents' house (yup, he was living at home) and there were no cars parked out front. It was even odder when I went inside and there was no one there but Ed. It turns out that all of Ed's "friends" were able to get tickets to the show after all. I was THE ONLY PERSON who showed up. It was pretty lame watching Star Wars all night with Ed, his parents, and his little sister, knowing that had I been less of a loser myself I could be at the theater. Ed’s parents REALLY liked me, though, because I was a nice girl. Apparently their idiot-loser-drop out son didn’t bring home very many nice girls. I bet they weren’t surprised when I stopped coming around.

No more loser-ness for me, though! I’ve got my tickets, and I will be there Thursday standing in line with all the other...um...okay, losers who took the day off to go see a geek movie.

It’s gonna be a rockin’ good time!

Game of Tag

2005-05-12T12:56:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Corn Pops
Current Mood: Sleeeeeepy

I’ve been tagged by Sarah.
I am supposed to complete 5 of the sentences below, and tag at least one other blogger I know to do the same. Here we go:

If I could be a scientist...
If I could be a farmer...
If I could be a musician...
If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter...
If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary...
If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect...
If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist...
If I could be a librarian...
If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an inn-keeper...
If I could be an athlete...
If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer...
If I could be a llama rider...
If I could be a bonnie pirate...
If I could be an astronaut...
If I could be a world famous blogger...
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world...
If I could be married to any current famous political figure...
If I could be a dog trainer...

If I could be an inn-keeper I would own a hotel on St. Croix with my family. Dad would do all the repairs, Mom and I would be housekeeping and concierge, Kitt would be the cook, Jana would tend bar, and Bryan would be the server/host. We’d have nice rooms that you don’t have to be a bajillionaire to stay in (unlike so many other Virgin Islands properties), and we would specialize in deals and help for people who are there to do genealogy research. AND we would serve homemade ice cream. A different flavor every night.

There’s a backstory to this—when Kitt and I and the Parents went to St. Croix a couple of years ago, we stayed in a crappy-ass hotel that had SO much potential. The woman who ran it was as crazy as they come, and just didn’t know what she was sitting on. While we were staying there, mom took a pretty bad fall down the stairs (THAT is a story for a whole other post…). We joked afterwards about how mom should sue the hotel, and then we’d own it. We dreamed about how we would all live there and what we’d do with the place…. Ah, St. Croix….

If I could be a painter I would illustrate children’s books. I would have my own studio filled with plants, places for my kitties to hang out, and an “inspiration corner”.

If I could be a chef I would work for Kellogs or Post or something, and come up with new recipes for cold cereal. I think it would be good to have Watchamacallit Cereal (like the candy bar, you know?). It would be like rice krispies flavored with chocolate and peanut butter (much like the Reese’s Puffs—ever had those?), and there would be chunks of krispies stuck together with caramel-y stuff. Mmmmm.

If I could be a doctor I’d be an obstetrician, and I would educate women about how their bodies were meant to give birth and knew how to do it naturally without the medical profession telling them how it is supposed to be done. I would educate them about the benefits of having an intervention-free birthing. Unless it was medically necessary, I would never induce labor, never give drugs to speed up labor, rarely ask women to give birth on their backs, and I would encourage every woman that they can do it without drugs.

If I could be a bonnie pirate I’d totally do it with Johnny Depp.

Dear Bryan—Tag, you’re it!

Decisions, decisions.

2005-05-05T12:04:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Cocoa Puffs
Current Mood: Pensive

I am faced today with one of those major, life-altering decisions. I HATE making decisions. And the bigger they are, the worse they are. I've never been one of those people who can see where they are going in life and what route they should take to get there. That's part of the reason I never got a degree-- I could never decide what to get and then what to do with it.

I'm so afraid of making the WRONG decision that it cripples me. I just want to be taken care of. Is that so much to ask?

I also have to make a reunion call today. For those who don't know me, I work part-time at an adoption agency. I run the search & reunion program, for adopted persons and birthmothers who are looking to reunite with the family they lost through adoption. It is so much fun, but SO scary. While finding who I am looking for can be hard, the hardest part is making the first call. YOU NEVER KNOW HOW THEY WILL REACT!! Especially when you call a birthmother. They might not have told their husband and children about the adoption. They might be ecstatic. They might swear at you and tell you never to contact them again. But usually, they cry.

It is a job full of joy because I get to help people discover a piece of themselves; but for me it is also a very difficult job because I get SO attached to my clients. If they are rejected for a reunion, I feel it deeply too. I have shed so many tears over the cases I work on! Fortunately I have only been told no twice. Both times I wanted to give it up. But I am glad I didn't! I get a huge thrill out of the search, and an even bigger thrill when the reunion turns out well. There is nothing like the feeling of knowing I helped someone who wanted it so badly.

I am not sure how today's case will turn out. I usually have a gut feeling about it; but with this one it is not a good or bad feeling... just... a feeling that it will all work out like it is supposed to. Whatever that means. Wish me luck!

Like a freakin' duck!

2005-05-03T12:55:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: FrankenBerry and Cheerios
Current Mood: Irritated at EVERYTHING

First of all, I am super-annoyed that for some reason my profile and links aren't showing up on my blog anymore. Is it just my computer, or can you all see them okay? I can't find any reason why this is happening; but we all know and love how "great" Blogger is.

So the weekend was pretty uneventful. After The Boy and I were sick all week, the Hubby finally got it, too. But I think the stench of throw up is finally clearing out of our house. The highlight of last week, aside from peeing myself while throwing up, was when we all finally felt good enough to go grocery shopping on Friday.

And then my husband told me, after watching me walk down the aisle, that I have started "waddling".

Great.

But speaking of the grocery store, I freakin' love mine. Sure, they don't always have the Lipton Asian Sidedishes that are so yummy (in a pre-packaged, boil-for-10-minutes-and-serve kind of way), and they started glazing the maple bars IN ADDITION TO the maple frosting (WTF? As if maple frosting isn't sweet enough?); but I love my grocery store because they have "Expectant Mother Parking". Right up front. No, RIGHT up front!

It kicks so much ass. Okay Seriously wrote a post about this some time ago, and I generally agreed with her. But now that I am at a point where it is obvious I'm pregnant (i.e., Waddling), I don't feel weird AT ALL about using these parking spots. In fact, I now get really pissed off if I see someone parking there who is A) Not pregnant, B) Less pregnant than me, or C) a man. (Watch it, man! Your beer gut is NOT a baby, no matter how much you nurse it!) The other day I gave the evil eye to a couple of women who parked there, but were questionably pregnant. (Either one of them might have been, but they were both ginormously fat so you wouldn't have known it anyways.) I stuck out my waddle-causing belly as far as it would go as I went past them, hoping that they would feel guilty for making me waddle 50 extra feet (Okay, so I'm pretty sensitive about the fact that I waddle! Cut me some slack!). They didn't appear to notice. No one who deserves it ever does.

So in other news, my Great-Aunt Becky is coming this week for nearly two weeks. I haven't seen her for just about two years now. It will be fun to see her. Although she will probably disapprove of many things that I am or am not doing. But that's what little old aunties are for, right?

I am also looking for ways to bring in more income (that don't include whoring myself out. Sorry). Maybe I will start charging to read palms. Yeah. E-mail me a scan of your palm and I will read it for you for 3 bucks.

Bare or Hair?

2005-04-28T17:27:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Frosted Mini-Wheats
Current Mood: Icky

American Idol is one of my guilty pleasures.

Now that I've admitted that, I can also admit that I feel sad about Constantine getting voted off.

I didn't think I would care as much as I do... I used to be all about the Anwar. I thought he was a beautiful speciman of a man. But then he started wearing shirts that were open at the chest. It really creeped me out to discover that he has no chest hair! I didn't realize it until then, but apparently body hair is something that I require in a man. I'm not saying that I want them to be Planet of the Apes hairy, but there's gotta be something there or I will question whether they are truly a man. Same goes with facial hair. And I don't even require that they have facial hair; just that they have the ability to grow it.

And who's hairier than a Greek?

After Anwar, Constantine WAS my favorite; but not because I thought he was Hot Stuff. I liked that he was different; that he wasn't a "Pop Singer", and that he wasn't trying to sing like a black man despite his white-ness. Let's face it, he looks WAY too much like creepy, drugged-up, 1970's "Lt. Dan" from Forrest Gump. And the way he kept making eyes at the camera made me squirm-- at first it was from embarrassment for him, because he looked like a doofus doing that. But towards the end--and I can admit this now-- I would squirm with something that I think may have bordered on lust.

Must have been the hair.

So long, Constantine.

hurk

2005-04-27T18:40:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Cream of Wheat (if you can call that cereal)
Current Mood: ill

So, last night The Boy and I either got the flu or food poisoning. The both of us were barfing all night. Let me say that it is not fun trying to clean up barf when you're about to do it, too.

I'm not a big barfer. Just don't do it. This was the first time for me in about 5 years. Before that it had probably been 7 years. I forgot how unpleasant it was. The crowning moment of the evening was when I was heaving uncontrollably at the toilet, and I completely and utterly peed myself. Now when was the last time you did THAT?? Stupid pregnant bladder.

Weekend highlights

2005-04-25T14:00:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Crispix and Kix
Current Mood: Tired

1) Went to Leatherby's Friday night, and finally got the ice cream that I have been craving for nigh on 3 weeks now.

2) Got some. Awesome.

3) Did "Projects" with my brother and his wife Saturday night. (you pick your favorite craft/hobby/project and work on it while we listen to music or watch movies)

4) Laughed as my Boy, who was crawling on the floor at the time, got humped by the brother's dog-- am I a bad mother or what? My kid gets raped by a dog and I laugh.

5) Didn't go to church on Sunday. Stayed home and played Rise of Nations with the Hubby while the Boy napped.

6) The Boy slept through the night for 2 nights in a row (we had to drug him up, though. He's getting 4 molars all at once...)

7) Was woken up a little too early this morning by a monster MF leg cramp that has left my calf feeling like someone hit it with a basball bat. What a way to start a Monday.

As Britney says, "Oops I did it again!"

2005-04-22T13:38:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Corn Chex
Current Mood: bored

Some of you might wonder about the title of my blog, "Accidentally insulting the world, one person at a time". You might be thinking, "What could this sweet little Mormon girl possibly do to insult anyone? She can barely even swear right."

It's time to tell you a few stories.

I have this really annoying habit of saying stuff without really thinking about what I'm saying. Generally, I end up offending someone. Take for instance my friend Sean. One day he was whining about how fat he was, how he's a tub of lard and is going to look like his dad one day. I, thinking I was doing him a favor by making him see how wrong he was, said "Oh Sean, you're not fat until you wear a 38-inch waist!" He visibly deflated. His shoulders hunched over, his head hung down, and he let out a noise somewhere between a whine and a moan. And he said, "Oh. I wear a 40..."

Then there was the time where Rob Whitworth-- a real self-righteous bastard, but I digress-- was complaining after he got his ACT scores back. He kept saying how stupid he was, and I was getting annoyed because I was sure he was just doing it for attention; and that his score was actually above-average and he was just saying he was stupid because he wanted people to know what his score was and that truthfully it was really high. (Did that make sense? Sorry for the run-on.) So I says to him, says I, "Rob, you're only stupid if you got less than a 20." I think you can see where this is going--I gotta stop saying stuff like this... Naturally his score was an 18. He looked pretty pissed, and I think he said something sarcastic in return. Needless to say, he wasn't as chummy with me after that. (But I can't feel too bad about that, because he was a tool. Still is, from what I understand.)

And then there was the time at a family party when I found out my cousin had named her [illegitimate] child 'Roy'. My response: "Roy!? What a stupid name! Why doesn't she just pin a 'kick me' sign to his onsie? What kind of a name is ROY?!?" This I said very loudly, just as his father, Roy Sr. walked in. Might I add that Roy Sr. was a scary looking gangsta-dude with a known criminal background? One day I will find "Roy was here" spelled out in bullet holes in the side of my house...

I have lots more stories like these. Some are more embarassing than others; some are more minor infractions-- but it seems to be my calling card nonetheless. If you are going to know me for an extended period of time, I am eventually going to insult you. Money-back guarantee.

I apologize in advance...

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!

2005-04-20T10:50:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Special K
Current Mood: Jumpy and nervous

I went to battle this morning. Nearly got myself killed. Wish my Xena-style leather armor* still fit me, 'cause I would have put it on. I might have at least felt braver then.

I had to face the biggest damn jumping spider I have ever seen inside a house.

And then I had to get CLOSE to it, close enough to poke it with a stick and make it move out from behind the kitchen sink so I could go in for the attack. I was shaking like chiuahua... I mean, it might have grabbed the stick I was poking it with and swung me around the room, cartoon-style. It might have jumped on me! (Jumping spiders can jump up to 20 feet, you know. I read it on the internet, so it must be true.) It certainly wanted to do something bad to me. I could tell by the look in it's eye. Eyes, I mean. All 30 of them, which I could see as plain as day BECAUSE THIS SPIDER WAS FRIKKIN' HUGE!!!

My attack mostly consisted of me screaming or yipping each time it moved, and then putting an empty Miricle Whip jar over it so's the husband can take care of it when he gets home. (He knows some people. Italians. He's gonna need their help.) And then I had a small panic attack when it was all over.

My skin has been crawling ever since. I seriously have to keep checking to see if there are spiders on me, or in my food, or in my hair, or on my chair everytime I sit down. And every black spot I see I scream at, until I can ascertain that it is just a pen lid or a nail sticking out of the wall. (People are starting to get nervous around me for this reason. Don't know why.)

It's a good thing I am in the office today and I left The Beast at home, a POW in a jar. Because if I were home I'd have to go check on it a zillion times to make sure that it hasn't blasted it's way out of the jar with the laser eye-beams that I'm sure it has and looked capable of using. And each time I have to look at it means one night of nightmares that my husband will have to suffer through with me (because I talk in my sleep).

I hate spiders. No, you don't understand-- I HATE spiders.

I feel proud of myself for being brave enough to face it like I did. And it's a good thing I did, too; because if I had just walked away from it, I would know that it was still in my house somewhere, but I wouldn't know where. It could end up in my bed one night. It could fall into something I'm eating (another huge phobia for me--and probably the root of why I have a hard time eating ground meat-- you just don't know what's been ground into it.) But I faced it, and now I have a war story that I can share.

*I don't really have Xena armor. But wouldn't it be cool if I did? I'd be the hottest mom on the block.

Fine Whine

2005-04-19T15:08:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: the very last crumbs of Raisin Bran; also Corn Chex and Life
Current Mood: Tired

You might be tired of hearing about my pregnancy, but this is my life people. Suck it up and listen to my whining.

I am carrying this baby really low. I did with Aiden, too, but since my stomach and uterus muscles are all stretched out from doing this already only 16 months ago, I am a lot bigger than last time. Most pregnant women look nicely proportioned, with this cute hump that extends from their boobs to their lower abdomen. I however, am carrying this kid in my crotch. See the illustration (no, I don't wear doofy brown shoes like that):

Carrying Low

This not only wreaks havoc on my back, it creates all sorts of problems:

1) Bending over is nigh on impossible. This means I can't pick up Aiden's toys or the stuff he pulls off all the shelves (The house is a friggin' hell-hole), I can't put on socks or shoes (there's a reason for the term "barefoot and pregnant", I'm learning), I can't clip my toenails, I can't paint my toenails (which makes me panic because sandal season is upon us and I refuse to look like a hag by wearing sandals without painted toenails), I can't shave my legs, I can barely pull up my own pants... the list goes on and on. Next time you bend over for any reason, think sympathetically of me and how hard my life is.

2) Sitting in a straight-back chair is damn uncomfortable. My legs are starting to fall asleep when I do this because I've got a 20-pound lump the size of a small beach ball resting on my legs. It also makes my stomach--no, make that my crotch-- hurt from the pressure. *whine*!

3) Similarly, sitting in any chair with my legs closed in the lady-like fashion my Young Women's leader from when I was 12 taught me how to do, is out of the question. Church is a little mortifying if I have to sit on the front row. Sorry, can't close those legs. Nothin' doin'. Got a huge lump in the way. The problem I have that goes along with this is now I have to wear long skirts to church. And when you have short stubby legs like I do, long skirts make you look ridiculously shorter; and they make your legs look fat.

4) Maternity clothes were not designed for my special situation. Nowadays they have jumped on the low-rise jeans craze and they are making maternity pants that have a big thick band that is supposed to go under your belly. They are very cute indeed; but I can't wear them because then I have a huge thick band squeezing me right where I am the biggest around. Hurts like hell. Plus, I don't think the kid likes them either. I try to wear them, and she starts wiggling around like a baby crocodile on a feeding frenzy. (Imagine getting elbowed or knee-ed in the stomach. Now imagine that on the inside.)

No, I have to wear the granny-pants style of maternity pants. The kind that you pull up to your armpits; and they have this huge stretchy panel that goes over your tummy. However, Not many places have these anymore I am discovering. If they do, they are extra, extra large. (No one caters to the small pregnant woman!)

Please, designers-- I have to get fat. Do I have to look like a dork, too? Please come up with a workable solution. At least put some back pockets on the granny-pants. Do you know how big and stupid your butt looks in jeans that don't have back pockets?

Anyways, the other problem I have with the maternity pants--even the granny pants--is that the stretchy panel still starts too high for my low, low, low tummy. I seriously need it to start RIGHT AT THE CROTCH. The panel generally starts a good 3 or 4 inches above the inseam, and my tummy starts to bulge at about 2 inches. This means I am still getting squeezed. By the end of the day, the baby has sunk even lower (if you can imagine), and wearing pants is excrutiating. Generally I change into my jammies once the husband gets home because I can't take it anymore. And we're not talking cute pajamas. I mean my big 'ol green nightgown. I couldn't look like more of a beast.

I know that by this time next month the only thing I will be able to wear is a muu-muu. It'll be awesome.

5) I have other small problems, too- but this post is getting a little out of hand. The last one I will mention is the lack of lap. Makes it hard to read bedtime stories to The Boy. The cats aren't too happy either. They try to sit on top of my stomach, and their poke-y little paws hurt!

Gee, only 3 more months to go!

Oh. My. Gosh.

2005-04-15T13:55:00.000-06:00

A g-g-g-ghost!

2005-04-14T22:54:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Raisin Bran & Corn Pops
Current mood: Sleeeeeeepy

Okay, business first.
1) A good friend read my post from yesterday and recognized it as a cry for help. This morning she invited Aiden and I up to the zoo. So I went today and had a wonderful, relaxing time. Oh, and Aiden liked it too. His favorites were the golden lion tamerins, the tigers, and feeding the geese. (I’ve always liked the giraffes, the flying foxes, and the hippos—though the hippo was gone. I hope they will be getting a new one!) We went on the train, we ate a popsicle (Dippin' Dots weren't open yet- damn!), we were outside getting sun and exercise, and there were no tantrums. Thank you, good friend, very, very much for a lovely afternoon. I needed that.

2) I have a new link to Erik with a K’s blog. I was tired of going to Scott or Sarah’s pages to find the link to check his blog, so he has officially become a Bit of Interest. Welcome aboard, EriK.

Now for pleasure. Spooky pleasure.
I mentioned in my last post that I loved ghost stories. I’m talking about real live stories of people or places that have been visited by ghosts, not the cheesy stories you tell around the campfire at Girl Scout Camp. I am fascinated from a scientific and religious standpoint by this phenomenon (do-doo-do-do-doo!)

So when I came across the Utah Ghost Investigators Society, I was pretty excited. Every Halloween they are guests on the radio station I listen to, and they play some of the recordings they have made of ghosts. Pretty creepy. A few years back, this group was doing a Halloween Night presentation at Fort Douglas, which is said to be haunted. Since we didn’t have kids, it was a weeknight, and we weren’t cool enough to go to a party, we decided to go. They gave a little presentation on ghosts, how they do investigations, and what they found when they investigated the Fort. At one point, one of the speakers interrupted his colleague and said that one of the ways that you can tell a ghost is around is with a compass—they affect the magnetic field, and so a compass will point towards a ghost rather than to North. He said that he had been watching the compass on his watch, and the arrow had been moving around the room.

I was sitting on an aisle. A little bit later, I noticed my arm getting really, really cold. Just ONE arm- the one in the aisle. I pointed it out to Kitt, and he could definitely feel a difference in the temperatures of my arms. I was sitting next to a sudden cold spot-- another sign of a ghostly presence. So we looked over at the compass-guy to see if he was still watching his compass. He was. He looked up from his compass/watch STRAIGHT AT US!!

Yup, there was a ghost hanging out next to me. Probably thought I was hot or something. For a living chick, I mean.

We were all excited and freaked out. And when we left, we took the Ghost investigators’ advice. They said that whenever they leave a place they have investigated, they ask the ghosts not to follow them home (apparently it had happened before to one of them). So when we got in our car, we told “Clem” that it was nice meeting him, but we didn’t have room for him at our house.

Yawn.

2005-04-13T17:51:00.000-06:00

Today's cereal: Corn Chex and Corn Pops
Current Mood: Boring

I’ve been struggling with things to post to my blog. Mostly because I have realized how very, very boring my life is. Here is my typical day:

1) Be woken up way too damn early by the Boy; watch Sesame Street until the hubby is out of the shower.
2) Eat breakfast, wave bye-bye to Da-Da.
3) Watch more PBS with the Boy while doing laundry/dishes/sweeping
4) Pick up all the videos and books that the Boy has thrown off the shelves, pick up all the things from the lowest drawers in every room that the Boy has thrown all over
5) Eat lunch, play with the Boy until naptime
6) Two glorious, blissful hours to myself! Which is taken up by finally getting a shower, returning any calls I might have to make for work, and then surfing the internet like a maniac in the little time left.
7) Snacks with the Boy, check the mail (sadly, one of the day’s highlights), waste time until the hubby comes home.
8) Lay on the couch, exhausted (from doing what, exactly???) while the Hubby wrestles with the Boy.
9) Fix/watch Kitt fix dinner, eat dinner, count the minutes until the Boy goes to bed
10) Read stories, sing a song, put the Boy in bed and hope he falls asleep.
11) Spend quality time with the hubby playing the computers until I am too tired to sit up straight (around 10:00)
12) Fall asleep listening to one of my hypnosis CD’s

Occasionally I will throw a trip to the park or a visit to a store into the routine. Sometimes I am so desperate to get out of the house and go anywhere that we will go to the Dollar Store. (If I go anywhere else I end up spending money we don’t have. If I go to the Dollar store, I can buy the Boy a new toy car and not feel bad because Hey! It’s a dollar!) But a trip to the Dollar store does not a good blog entry make.

I am thinking of going to the zoo again, maybe on Friday. More for me than the Boy. I freakin’ love the zoo. He is indifferent; though I think he really liked the train ride last time. (And I can’t wait until the Dippin’ Dots stand opens! I have an unnatural love for them. Have you seen these things? Have you tried them? They are crazy. Crazy good.) Then I can post about how bad my butt hurts afterwards from all the walking. I’m sure you’ll all love to hear about my butt.

On another note, we’ve been given free tickets anywhere JetBlue flies. Usually we’d go to Disneyland, especially for the 50th anniversary (does anyone else cry when they see Disneyland commercials?), but since I can’t freakin’ go on any of the good rides and Kitt would feel like a tool going on them without me, we’re thinking San Francisco. I haven’t been since I was like 11, and Kitt has never been. Any thoughts on cheap hotels (where we both won’t get raped)? Any suggestions on what to do? We are considering renting a car and heading to the Winchester Mystery House (we love ghosts! Remind me to tell you about our encounter at Fort Douglas…). Just how far is it from San Fran to San Jose? Any trip advice is appreciated.

The greatest dog ever? I don't think so.

2005-04-11T12:59:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Raisin Bran & Corn Pops
Current Mood: Energetic

So, the other day the Hubby and I were discussing the drawbacks of owning a big red dog. Besides the obvious one of where do you keep him, there are some other problems that the show never discusses. For instance, how does little Emily Elizabeth clean up after her ginormous pet? I give them a month before the little Birdwell Island landfill is full to the top with big red poo. And how do they feed that behemoth? I have a hard time believing that they can buy enough dog food just from the income of a little souvenir shop. And how did they neuter Clifford? (And if they didn't neuter him, how many people have died after he tried to hump their leg?) I can't imagine being licked by him, either. It looks all cute and lovey on the cartoon, but imagine the dry cleaning bills in real life.

I like dogs, but only little dogs. Nothing bigger than a beagle for me, thank you. My problem with big dogs is that they have big poo and big drool. A dog bigger than a house? Hmmmmm.....

A few things I would sell my soul for...

2005-04-08T13:08:00.000-06:00

Today's Cereal: Vanilla Creme Frosted Min-Wheats
Current Mood: Snacky

...or at least rent it out for a while for.

1) Something else besides Spaghetti-O's for lunch
2) Curly hair
3) A cheesecake blizzard from Dairy Queen
4) Perfect pitch
5) A few more inches (5'6" sounds so nice! And I wouldn't have to hem EVERY SINGLE FREAKIN' pair of pants I buy...)
6) A Rumbi Island Grill within walking distance
7) A clone of myself
8) A few more hours of sleep every night
9) A cat that doesn't shed
10) A trip to St. Croix tomorrow